July 2018 July 2018 | Page 6

All this is to protect The Green Bank Tele- scope which can be thrown off its game by errant electrical signals such as the type emitted by cell phones. There is one microwave in the town and it is in a vault. Spark plugs cause the telescope to have headaches as well so only diesel- powered cars are permitted. And there is no radio station. Hogeway Village is a town where every resident has dementia. The town was specifically designed to take care of de- mentia patients and, although it appar- ently looks just like a normal town, it is, in essence, a nursing home facility. The 250 workers in the town are healthcare providers dressed to look like clerks, neighbors, friends, etc. No one wears scrubs. The goal is to trick the 152 res- idents into thinking they live in a normal small town. According to the article, “Peachtree City is only 23.9 square miles, yet it has two 18-hole golf courses and one 27-hole course. For perspective, Manhattan is 22.8 square miles. So imagine two full-size and one mega-size golf courses spread around New York. Peachtree loves their golf. They love it so much that residents have adopted the most fun part of golf into their daily lives: driving golf carts. Peachtree City is the golf cart capital of the world. “Over 9,000 households in Peachtree City own a golf cart. That’s more than any other place on Earth by a long shot. Why would so many people need so many 6 WWW.GOLFCAROPTIONS.COM golf carts? I can’t speak to whether they all just love golf that much, but I’m going to guess it has something to do with the 90+ miles of golf cart paths the town has packed into its 23.9 square miles of land. Golf carts are a way of life. The entire town has conformed to the golf cart life- style like someone lied to them and told them everything is fine and life is one big resort vaca- tion. People can go anywhere in town on a golf cart. Children too? Yup! “Once a kid hits 12 in Peachtree City they can legally drive a golf cart as long as they’re ac- companied by a guardian. At 15 they can cart ... around town without supervision. Golf carts are to high-school- ers in Peachtree what hot rods and dragsters were to kids in the 1950s. On any given day, hun- dreds of carts can be seen driving people around with hardly a full-sized car in sight. The local police department has a special golf cart pa- trol unit, and plenty of local businesses have golf cart park- ing spaces. At least one high school would prefer if their students drove to school in golf carts due to limited park- ing.” This dubious award comes to these four towns courtesy of Cracked.com a humor site that is the survivor of the now-defunct Cracked Magazine, which once was a competitor of Mad Magazine. Hopefully, the good folks in the four small towns will exercise some humor and laugh along with the people who read the article. After all, not everyone gets to be in the top four in the world!