ACTION STEPS:
• What is it that you keep
resisting? Can you see the
resisting is what drives peace
away from you? What do you
hope to gain by hanging on?
What is available to you by
letting go?
• How do you go about
surrendering? By breathing
deeply? By forgiving?
Praying? Consciously
changing your self-talk? Ask
someone you respect how
he or she goes about letting
go. It’s such an important
skill, and I want you to be
excellent at it!
• Like the baby in the story,
sometimes letting go requires
experiencing the emotions
deeply. Safely expressing
anger or crying deeply into
a pillow or while someone
holds you releases your stuckness in the yuk. It’s like an
ice-jam breaking free and the
emotions carry the pain out
of your body. Be sure to let
someone in on your pain, as
experiencing it by yourself
may make you feel isolated
and abandoned. To heal fully,
you may need to have the
experience of knowing you
are part of the normal human
race, not an aberration of it.
This is why not being alone in
your pain can make it easier
to let go.
90 | Eydis Magazine
Whether my tantrum is loud and boisterous, or a quiet,
more personal agony, my relief, my release, my freedom
comes when I stop fighting, stop resisting, and trust that all
is well, even when life is not taking shape the way I would
have chosen.
As Eckhart Tolle points out in his book, A New Earth, “When
you can’t stand the endless suffering anymore, you begin
to awaken.” What we awaken to is the understanding and
acceptance of the truth that resisting what we can’t change
leads only to one place—misery.
I’m grateful for the lesson that the two-year-old blessed
me with that day, the reminder that much of my suffering
is of my own making. Demanding my own way, rather than
cooperating with life, uses up lots of energy and leads
me further away from my goal of peace and happiness.
Acceptance of what is, brings me closer to it.
By the way, I noticed a whole plane full of people whose
peace was renewed that day when the one who was resisting
finally surrendered. And I realized, too, how much peace I
bring to those around me when I take responsibility to create
my own. Peace within, peace without. Make sense?
David is a licensed psychologist in private practice who
has been leading people into life fulfillment for more than
thirty years. His work with Kate Sholonski at Triumph
Leadership Group involves creating and sustaining healthy
and productive relationships in the workplace. David is a
contributing author to four books, has been a TV talk show
host, and resides in rural Minnesota with his wife, Carol.