INSPIRATIONAL
BUNGEE
She ran, but she could feel the
strength of His pull. Could she
outrun Him?
As I leaned forward to switch off the
stereo, the van crossed over the
center line just enough to startle me.
Navigating through bitter, angry
tears, I slowly meandered my way to
work.
"I don't want to be fettered or
tethered or whatever that word
was," I said, crying out to the one I
was desperately trying to avoid.
"Can't you just leave me alone?"
The song was turned off, but the
words still hung in my head,
beckoning to be addressed:
'O to grace how great a debtor
Daily I'm constrained to be!
Let that grace now like a fetter,
Bind my wandering heart to Thee.
Prone to wander, Lord, I feel it,
Prone to leave the God I love;
Here's my heart, O take and seal it,
Seal it for Thy courts above.‘
At this point in my life, it wasn't so
much about wandering as it was a
flat-out-full-on run. I did not want to
be bound or tied to a God who
allowed so much hurt and
disappointment. I wanted to be free.
To be free to do whatever I wanted,
whenever I wanted. My mother had
served God her whole life and was
now wasting away from Alzheimer's.
I had no use for Him.
For months I had been avoiding
church and most of my Christian
friends. God and I were in a tug-ofwar and I didn't need anyone else
pulling on His side. I began to hang
out more and more with the girls at
work who sympathized with my
predicament and soothed
JASMINE'S PLACE
48