Jasmine's Place Issue No. 11 - May/June 2014 - Page 25

When was the last time you went out on a date, for a meal, the cinema? These things are important, but if there is really a sense of people growing apart, then that is a deeper issue. PCR: And praying together of course. (i.e. another way to deal with a spouse’s disinterest). Can a marriage be stronger if a couple have come to realise each other’s weaknesses and if one or both of them have fallen and forgiven each other and started again, can a marriage be stronger or is it permanently weakened? People mistake forgiveness for trust. There are certain things that happen in marriages - if we see certain things happen again and again, there may well come a time when we need to say “can I really trust this person again?” Joseph had clearly forgiven his brothers for their betrayal and brutality. You could tell, he was weeping so loud the Egyptians heard him. But he didn’t yet know if he could trust his brothers, so with the wisdom of God, he set up some scenarios to see if they had changed. I’m not suggesting we set up some elaborate scenarios in our marriages… JN: Absolutely, we serve a God who is able to do complete healing and restoration works in our hearts and lives. When somebody has made that horrible mistake and they have in some way betrayed or let down their husband or wife, and where that spouse is able to fully forgive, where they’re both able to be restored, where they can put their marriage right again, they can go on and have a really strong happy marriage. PCR: With some lovely looking women… And this is it. We as Christians have a God who answers prayers, that heals our hearts, we have hope that just isn’t out there normally. Interview reproduced by Puaichie Badejo with permission from Premier Christian Radio’s Inspirational Breakfast. Tune in on Mondays-Fridays 7am -10am on DAB, online and MW 1305 MW 1413. For more details, visit http://www.premier.org.uk/ PCR: You mentioned forgiveness. That in itself is really difficult, but let’s say that we’ve managed to forgive our partner, what about trust? How can you learn to trust them again? JN: …and that is not wise and not the way we do things, but we’ve got to understand the difference between forgiveness and trust. It is painful to forgive, but it is worth it. Trust is something else and trust needs to be earned over a period of time. PCR: Right, we need to earn trust. JASMINE'S PLACE 25