January 2018 Issue #13 Issue #13 Jan 2018 4Guys | Page 28

2. Both the sex and the guy were awful
We’re not talking bad technique here. You picked up the guy when you were high or
drunk, even though you know that’s a problem for you, and now you feel like it was
just another time when you were out of control. Maybe the guy was so hot that you
gave in and had sex that you know was risky and unsafe and now you’re worrying
about HIV or some other STD.
Some sex is really, really bad – when you’ve been assaulted, for instance. Maybe
you are feeling violated because what happened was essentially date rape. Too of-
ten men think rape is something that happens only to women. They don’t recognize
that having someone not take no for an answer is also a form of sexual assault,
even if no one pulled a knife or a gun. Men who are drunk or high or who are just
coming out can be particularly vulnerable to this sort of assault because they have
trouble setting limits. Learning to say no and learning to protect yourself is important.
The woods aren’t full of creeps, but hey: be careful out there.