“ It ’ s always better to be yourself , because to be human is to be imperfect .”
Dr . Shellie : How did your parents feel about you staying at the shelter ?
Zulaikha : At first , they were like , “ It ’ s just girls , right ?” My mom had volunteered at Grace Smith House , too —
Dr . Shellie : You remind me so much of me and Alyssa .
Zulaikha : Right ? So she knew about the importance of this experience — she told my dad to let me stay there during the summer . You can ’ t be afraid of people who need help if that ’ s what you want to do . If you ’ re doing it so people tell you , like , “ You ’ re a good person ,” it ’ s never going to work . You ’ re not going to really help anyone .
Dr . Shellie : You won ’ t be on everybody ’ s level , and you won ’ t be able to empathize and communicate the right way .
Zulaikha : Exactly . They ’ re going to see through it . I feel like the biggest mistake , in anything you do , is when you underestimate people or think that people won ’ t see through something . It ’ s always better to be yourself , because to be human is to be imperfect . So if you were authentic , at the very least , you can say , “ Well , I did what I thought was right at the time .” That ’ s the most you can ask of anyone . And a lot of people don ’ t understand that .
Dr . Shellie : That ’ s so true .
Zulaikha : I don ’ t expect anyone to do more than what ’ s humanly possible , and that ’ s hard for some people . It ’ s true . They think that all the wrong things are the things to aspire to . We need to be successful , so they think that means driving this car , and having this job , and living in this building . By the time I realized that these things were important to other people , I already had been comfortable enough with them — because of my parents ’ success — that they didn ’ t matter to me .
Dr . Shellie : So what did matter to you ? Zulaikha : I wanted other things , like friends , and I wanted experiences that were fun . I already knew what it was like to sit in my parents ’ big house and have all the toys and the biggest Christmas tree . It was great , and I ’ m so thankful to my parents , but on the same token , your fancy car doesn ’ t help make funny pictures of your jerk boyfriend when he dumps you for someone else . Your friends are going to do that .
Dr . Shellie : Absolutely . Zulaikha : I always valued people so much more than things . But people can be superficial .
Dr . Shellie : What do you mean by that ?
Zulaikha : They look at an idea of a person before they care about what they ’ re like . Some people judge others before they get to know them .
Dr . Shellie : Yes , judging the book by the cover .
Zulaikha : Yes ! I have a friend who has tattoos all over his body , and they ’ re beautiful . They ’ re amazing . They all mean something to him . And people judge him before they get to know him , and he ’ s really smart and kind . Also , it ’ s always disappointing when people who everyone respects are not always nice people .
Dr . Shellie : Have you dealt with this personally ? Zulaikha : Yes , because sometimes people can be fake .
Dr . Shellie : Do you feel like that ’ s changed since you ’ ve become a model and very well-known ? Zulaikha : No .
Dr . Shellie : No . Okay .
Zulaikha : I don ’ t think that ’ s changed at all . And of course , working this gig , you get exposed to guys like that , too .
Dr . Shellie : Yes .
Zulaikha : Some guys are weird , superficial — I call them modelizers . Some of them will go to a fashion party and pay $ 25,000 for this table , but they have nothing to do with this industry . We know what they ’ re doing .
Dr . Shellie : Yeah , we know what they ’ re doing .
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