times , accept failure and rise above it . It taught me a lot of life lessons very early , and I ’ m grateful for that .”
It seems as if in life , each next choice or option that comes our way brings us one step closer to fulfillment . How did accepting a role in Showboat affect you ?
It wasn ’ t what I expected . After college , I accepted a role in ShowBoat to tour the United States and Canada . However , I realized , after a while , that although performing was my talent and I always wanted to do a national tour , my heart wasn ’ t satisfied . All the dreams that I thought I wanted like success , touring the world , being on Broadway , weren ’ t as important to me as love was . I was engaged at the time , and I chose to come home . I chose to create a going from salsa to opera to now blues ; I had to become like a chameleon .
After all these years , the band has changed tremendously , it ’ s a great representation of every band member , and it honors each one ’ s experience and genre . Every person gets to shine and show off , which is really cool .
After returning home and creating the balance between her love for performing and craving love and stability , de Matteo ’ s spirit was about to be tested again . On the morning she and her mom were supposed to celebrate their birthdays , de Matteo got news of her mom being struck by a car . Over the next 24 days , de Matteo tried to remain busy and strong while her mother went through various surgeries . de Matteo was either at the hospital or on stage during this time . The time spent performing was her
“ After she died , I went into a serious depression .”
life , not abandon music but create balance . I felt as if I knocked a few things off my bucket list , but when I closed my eyes at night , lying in a hotel room , I just wasn ’ t satisfied anymore . I knew it wasn ’ t for me .
So this experience led you to realize that the feeling of “ home ” was important ?
It was . I was an only child , and I didn ’ t have a lot of family around . My mother was a single , working mom , and she would work her butt off . She would travel all the time . There was no real home or sense of stability which is what I craved . She was the best , and I have no qualms about how I was raised . I wanted that feeling of security and love and I knew that I had to create it . So coming home was important . But , I don ’ t do well with not working .
And this is how No Bad Juju came to be ?
Yes , No Bad Juju was created with several really talented musicians in the Pittsburgh area . We were contracted to be a house band , and it was a 4-day-aweek job . The quality of music was and is excellent . However , it ’ s blues and old school R & B , which I wasn ’ t familiar with at all . I had to stretch myself ,
“ release from all of that fear and anxiety .” After her mom ’ s passing , de Matteo was about to struggle but would come out stronger than ever .
How did the loss of your mother affect you and when did that final commitment to living again happen ?
Remember , my mother was everything . Most of my family is in Peru . I have a great support system , don ’ t get me wrong , but in regards to a father or siblings , she was it . Because of that , all of my past sadness , issues , and trauma came crashing down , in addition to losing her in that way . After she died , I went into a serious depression . I started using alcohol to numb the pain . I was still doing some shows , but in 2012 , I knew that I needed help , and it had to come from within . I know I needed psychotherapy , but I needed more because my insides were rotting . I was willing to try anything .
Was this when fitness became your focus ?
Yes . A friend of mine introduced me to Shakeology , and it was as if after the first sip , I could feel the nutrients that I was lacking . I went through several programs , and I climbed back to my physical and
44 INSPIRING LIVES WINTER 2017