In Gear | Rotary in Southern New Zealand Issue 2 | Page 37

Adisyn-Hope

grief to coping with clinical necessities.
Emmerson would be induced early the
following week, bringing on the birth of their
daughter.

Still looking pregnant and recovering from
what was an arduous delivery, Emmerson
went to pick her baby’s urn and finalise her
funeral.

“You take the tablets to end the pregnancy,
and then they took us to see the room where
we’d have her, and then we had the weekend.

They had brought Adisyn home, her wee body
preserved by ice packs tucked in beneath her.
The latest technology – a revolutionary cooling
system called ‘CuddleCots’, which fits under
a Moses basket or bassinette and greatly
prolongs the time families can spend with
their babies – wasn’t available, at that time, in
Wellington.

“We went home and planned her funeral.”
Like all expectant mothers, Emmerson packed
her bag for the hospital, where she was
induced on the Monday morning. Adisyn was
born sleeping at 3.10pm, Tuesday, July 29.
For all of the trauma and grief, Emmerson
experienced beauty in the birth: the wonder
and joy of finally meeting the baby she had
carried for six months.
“She was born in the Pohutukawa Room, so
Ben has a tattoo of pohutukawa flowers, a
fantail and her name.

My heart has been
forever changed
with her dying. I
think a piece of
me died when
she died. But,
also, her life has
brought so many
precious gifts.”
Emmerson Morgan
“She was quite long … she had a little button
nose, and she had the most perfect little hands
and feet.
“I can’t even really articulate what that
experience was like – traumatic obviously …
we left the hospital carrying our dead baby in a
Moses basket, not in a car seat.
“But it was still beautiful. My heart has been
forever changed with her dying. I think a piece
of me died when she died. But, also, her life
has brought so many precious gifts.”

“We had her with us for three days – but,
because she was just on ice, after the first 24
hours, she had to be covered.”

During the time she had at home, one of
Adisyn’s parents was always with her. It was
during those few days, they created a treasure
trove of keepsakes and memories. The doting
parents played her music, read her stories and
captured whatever reminders they could of
her – one of the most poignant mementos are
prints of those perfect little hands and feet.
“Ben and I had both been wearing heart pins,
and, before we had her cremated, we had put
those on her.

“Ben went and chose her a toy – there were all
sorts of wee things we put in with her.
“And we wrote her letters; Ben and I both
wrote to her, and the letters went in with her.
We had written them privately, but then we
read them to her together before we took
her to her service. That was so special – it was
what we really wanted her to know.”
Adisyn had an intimate, moving service,
conducted by a close family friend, with
Emmerson’s parents by their sides.
“It was very special, and very beautiful.”

In amongst the harrowing aftermath of
Adisyn dying, Emmerson’s determination their
daughter’s legacy would live on strengthened.
In fact, she believes, it’s been that resolve to
honour Adisyn’s memory through kindness
and giving, together with sharing their family’s
story to build greater understanding and
education around baby and infant loss, that’s
kept her going.

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