If and Only If: A Journal of Body Image and Eating Disorders Winter 2015 | Page 88

her.

“Good morning.”

Lisbeth stumbled into the kitchen and gratefully accepted the steaming mug of coffee Jake handed her. She felt sheepish for waking late, she normally always was awake before him, but she felt unusually tired and weak. Her stomach rumbled like thunder, and she looked wanly at the single banana on the counter. The smell of ham assaulted her nose. She was happy to see Jake had not waited on her to make his breakfast. He stood in front of the stove in a white wife beater and a pair of black sweat pants. His long arms bent at the elbows as he turned the ham steaks over in the cast iron skillet.

Her mouth curled in disapproval of the two plates sitting on the marble counter top next to the stove. She hoped they were for Dora and Jake, because the banana and possibly the grapefruit (although maybe not since she found the bitterness a punishment she couldn’t bear) were the only things her diet allowed for breakfast.

Jake slid the steaks on to each plate, and to her horror placed one plate in front of her. She squirmed in her seat trying to think of a gentle way to turn down his plate of food. The eggs were a perfect over easy as she liked them, her heart started to melt as she realized the breakfast was made specifically with her in mind, making what she needed to do even harder.

“Um, I think we should save this plate for Dora,” Lisbeth slid the plate in front of a seat adjacent to her.

Jake leaned forward, placing the plate back in front of her. “Dora’s not here, she’s out having brunch with her friends. Eat up baby; I made the eggs just like you like them.”

Tears brimmed at edge of eyes, threatening to turn her into a blubbering wreck.

“I can’t.” She pushed the plate away and took a deep breath before reaching for the banana from the fruit bowl in the center of the table.

“Did your doctor diagnose you with diabetes? Is that why you’re doing this special diet?”

“No.” Lisbeth looked down at her hands to avoid the quizzical pools of honey that stared at her.

“Are you having high cholesterol problems? High blood pressure?”

“No,” Lisbeth said.

“Then what the hell is your problem?”