How to Coach Yourself and Others Coaching and Counseling in Difficult Circumstances | Page 137

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Risk communication practitioners may not like asking questions, fearing that they’ll be stuck with the answers.
But if the answers are likely to be honest, getting them onto the table will probably do more good than harm in
the long term, even if the answers are sure to be hostile and the interaction is sure to be unpleasant. Asking
stakeholders why they mistrust you, for example, or why they oppose your proposal, is a good way to get their
objections out into the open. Even if you haven’t got a good response, or they don’t want to hear your response,
just ventilating their grievances will reduce their outrage a bit, so the conversation can focus more productively
on the disputed extent of the hazard.
The rule of thumb here: If people are upset, you’re usually better off letting them get it off their chest. You’re
better off if they’ve had a chance to vent, if you’ve heard what they’ve got to say, and if they know you’ve
heard it. Letting people criticize you is itself an empathic thing to do. So find a way to ask the question.
But sometimes your stakeholders aren’t likely to answer your question honestly, especially a question about
feelings. They may be denying or projecting some of what they’re feeling. They may be confused about how
they feel. Or they may be thoroughly in touch with their feelings but disinclined to share them with you – maybe
they think it would be rude or tactically unwise to do so; maybe they think i N(