How to Coach Yourself and Others Beware of Manipulation

6. Hypnotic manipulation Hypnosis is another way of influencing people’s thoughts and emotions in order to make them want to do what you want them to do. Hypnotists rely on authority, environment, ceremonies, social aspects, bus basically manipulate people’s mind most of all through the use of specific communication techniques. It may be a good idea to remember that people will react in defence as soon as they suspect that they are being forced or manipulated. All people love to be liked. Strangely enough however, almost everybody will pull back from you if you walk straight up to them and tell them you like them. In the same way, they will pull back as soon as they think you want to sell them something. If you want people to like you, you have to seduce them first. If you want to sell them anything, you have to make them want to buy what you are offering them. Remember the movie "The Prestige"? In order to lead us to seeing and believing the "impossible" outcome that he's about to produce, a magician starts with drawing up a plan and a strategy which he then studies, rehearses, improves and puts into practice until he can produce the desired result so to speak blindfolded and without any hesitation. In the movie, the general plan is described as this: A/ The pledge: You need to get the people's attention and interest, give them a reason to listen to you, create trust, offer a wider perspective, promise fun, security, happiness, benefit or advantage. B/ The turn: Without interaction and emotional involvement, your pledge will lead to nothing and will soon be forgotten. You will not obtain the desired outcome, unless you work toward it in a planned, structured, strategic way. You need to obtain interaction and emotional involvement from your listener. C/ The prestige: But of course, unless you can close the deal, nothing is ever won. The turn, therefore is always function of the prestige. You cannot hit a target if you don’t know what you are aiming at. Good strategies are of little use if you do not have a fixed goal, determination and self confidence. Also remember the laws of authority and of social proof: When people find themselves in a foreign situation where they feel awkward or unsure of how to act, they look for those social cues that will dictate their behaviour. People conform because they believe everyone else is correct People conform because they fear the social rejection of not going along People conform simply because it's the norm People conform because of cultural influences People conform because somebody of authority says something is correct People conform because somebody they love believes in something 216

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