How to Coach Yourself and Others Beware of Manipulation | Page 181

68. Reframing
Description
A frame, or frame of reference is a complex schema of unquestioned beliefs, values and so on that we
use when inferring meaning. If any part of that frame is changed (hence 'reframing'), then the meaning
that is inferred may change.
To reframe, step back from what is being said and done and consider the frame, or 'lens' through which
this reality is being created. Understand the unspoken assumptions, including beliefs and schema that
are being used.
Then consider alternative lenses, effectively saying 'Let's look at it another way.' Challenge the beliefs
or other aspects of the frame. Stand in another frame and describe what you see. Change attributes of
the frame to reverse meaning. Select and ignore aspects of words, actions and frame to emphasize and
downplay various elements.
Thus, for example, you can reframe:
•A problem as an opportunity
•A weakness as a strength
•An impossibility as a distant possibility
•A distant possibility as a near possibility
•Oppression ('against me') as neutral ('doesn't care about me')
•Unkindness as lack of understanding
•etc.
You can often change a person's frame simply by changing their emotional state, making them happier,
more aggressive, etc. When they are happier, for example, they will be more positive and optimistic
(and vice versa).
Example
You say it can't be done in time. But what if we staged delivery or got in extra help? I'm sure we can
produce an acceptable product in the timeframe.
It does seem stupid, but it's also stupid not to look again and see what else can be done.
It's not so much doing away with old ways as building a new and exciting future.
We have shown we can argue well. Maybe this means we can also agree well.
Why it works
Watzlawick, Weakland and Fisch (1974) describe the 'gentle art of reframing' thus:
To reframe, then, means to change the conceptual and/or emotional setting or viewpoint in relation to
which a situation is experienced and to place it in another frame which fits the 'facts' of the same
concrete situation equally well or even better, and thereby changing its entire meaning.
We make meaning from the world around us by taking a limited number of facts and inferring or
assuming other detail to be able to make sense of things.

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