How to Coach Yourself and Others Beware of Manipulation | Page 126

JOB INTERVIEWER.
Manipulators tend to focus on the private and business life of people.
Justification: mistakes made in one's personal or business life highlight character and provide
information on how this person will act in office.
USE SARCASM, MOCKERY, CARICATURE, TREAT SOMEONE OR SOME ACTION AS A
JOKE
The question that has to be asked about much of this is the following: if manipulators have to wrap
their attacks in disguises, does this mean the reasons they implicitly or explicitly give for what they are
doing are all merely disguises? Can’t they genuinely be pursuing positive values in making an attack?
The answer is yes, although, as noted elsewhere, ferreting out what is what, is a complicated issue,
given the complex motives behind human communication.
The real question is: how can we determine if efforts to discredit are sincere and legitimate, and,
beyond that, is sincerity a justification? And if not, what criteria can we use to determine if discrediting
attacks are legitimate. If there are two discrediting attacks and I consider one sincere but wrong and the
other insincere but right, how do I make a moral judgment?
WAYS OF ENHANCING OR DEFENDING IMAGE:
Just as manipulators, journalists, and others, have a set of techniques, disguises and justifications, for
discrediting image, so they have them for enhancing or defending someone’s image (and for other
actions, we well). In fact, the reverse of all the techniques described above, to discredit, can be used.
People can accept the good things people say and imply about themselves and others at face value,
with probing behind the image. They can portray good works and highlight flattering moments. They
can repeat compliments from others and invite compliments for their subjects. They can tell or write
heartwarming stories about good deeds performed by saints and heroes, that are the opposite of outrage
stories. They can flatter, themselves, idealize by presenting their subjects as all good, and very good,
and treat their subjects with an aura of seriousness, respect or reverence.
Just as discrediting attacks are typically acts of aggressive domination toward the objects of the attack,
so crediting stories are often acts of subordination. Stories that flatter, that depict people from their
own perspective, as they would like to be depicted, are legion. All of a sudden, the manipulator has
only credit-enhancing things to say about the subject and is content to act as his or her spokesman.
Potentially discrediting information isn't raised or is treated very gently. The question here is: what did
he obtain in return?

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