Her Culture Bi-Monthy Magazine August/September 2015 | Page 77

Who we are and where we are from are two parts
of ourselves that meld together to create our
identity. Our past and our present are connected,
just as the sun to the sky-- they change and follow
each other. A Kikongo proverb says “One can only
steal a sleeping baby: once awake, she will look
for her parents.” The past month, I have awaken,
and am now following that instinctive pull back to
my heritage and my past, to find who I am.
My mother, who would once dance the polka
across the hallways with me, now tells of the push
and pull dance between her Korean roots and
American life. She says it’s important to remember
who we are, in order to anchor who we can
become.
She came when she was 10, on a plane she
remembers herself holding tight onto the edge of
her seat-- holding tight onto hope as she set flight.
Her dreams and hopes were as big as the skies
and oceans she was crossing. Her head was filled
with pictures drawn by her aunt, who told of such
an abundance that oranges would litter and adorn
the sidewalks, left untouched. That aunt was also
her family’s road to the land of milk and honey.
She had met her husband, a G.I., during the
Korean War and came to America after the War
Brides Act. My mother and her family were second
wave immigrants, coming after The Immigration
and Nationality Act opened the gates to
immigrants with family already in the U.S.
But the American Dream is more than having a
vision-- it takes drive, sweat, and sleepless nights
in order for those dreams to become reality. She
entered a entirely different world, but it was filled
with the same. The same eyes that would look at
her with a strange, questioning glance. The same
mouths that would tell her to go back home. The
same feet that would walk that confident stride of
comfortable belonging. Life in America was far
from a Hollywood movie. She couldn’t speak a
single word of English, going from a top student to
being held back four years . There were cruel kids,
who didn’t know any better than to follow their
instinct of rejecting anything different. But there

77

were also summers filled with buckets of 7/11
slurpees from her parents' shop and opportunity.
She was able to break free of the mold women
were expected to follow in Korea-- give first,
receive last. She was able to unapologetically
chase after who she wanted to be. True to the the
American Dream, hard work brought success and
she eventually graduated as valedictorian and a
scholarship to UCLA.
Like most immigrant families, her parents were
constantly away at work, leaving h