Hello Monaco Winter 2018–2019 HelloMonaco #05 Winter 2018–2019 - Page 151

POOR RICH KIDS a doctor or a builder. Playing, dreaming, explo­ring — this is how a child exploits his inner potential. This is a source of creati­ vity, a quality more sought after these days than ever before. Our «must» and «should» often block the creative impulses in chil- dren. Not surprisingly they then grow pas- sive and inert. Practicing social skills. A child who is growing behind a high villa fence, super- vised by his nannies and governesses, is of- ten not familiar with very simple things. He quite honestly believes the «big» world to be an enlarged copy of his «little» world. He does not go into the street «just like that», taking the subway or a bus. A man is a social being. Any isolation, even in the most comfortable conditions, is not good for him. Children should therefore be allowed to integrate into ordinary life. © http://macnamara.ca You can go on a walk through town, take unfamiliar streets, stop in small inexpen- sive cafes. It might be good to visit an ex- hibition. But try avoiding setting yourself apart and creating an atmosphere of exclu- sivity — so avoid always attending events for specially invited guests, like privileged opening days. Go on any other day instead, like everyone else. You can also go to a playground in some park or courtyard, to a shop, a market or a bakery. I heard of one original experiment. Some wealthy parents decided to introduce their quite spoiled son to how an ordinary life would feel. They found him a nanny who was a mother of five children. The boy was taken to the nanny’s home every day, as if it were a kindergarten. She did not treat him any differently from the other kids. He was responsible for doing some light housework and helping to look after the younger ones. A great way for practicing social skills is taking public transport. A new social role, that of a passenger, will get the child to solve new psychological challenges. He is told when he needs to get up, give way to somebody, what to say and how to inter- act with other passengers. Not only do we teach him some basic social rules, but we introduce him to a different environment. He will start to perceive things differently. Love and support. Most parents have cer- tain expectations of their children which are not always fulfilled. We may imagine our son to be a confident, handsome and brilliant intellectual. We can’t boast quite as easily about a pimply teenager with greasy hair, unhappy with everything, mo- rose and clumsy. Whatever your child is like, your love is just as necessary to him as the air he breathes. It is important to him to be always loved regard- less of his success, appearance, behaviour, whether he corresponds to a beautiful image we created in our mind or not. Our uncondi- tional love is an emotional foundation that gives him self-confidence, a sense of security. This is a powerful support letting him carry out his potential and talents to the fullest. There is no way we can reshape children ac- cording to our patterns. Parental love does have two sides to it: receiving and trans- forming. This means that we do love our child as he is. But at the same time we are try- ing to create conditions for his multilateral development. We are striving to discern and reveal his crea- tive potential. Our love should therefore not just be an ab- stract thing. It is there to meet Л rus ет пятнадцать назад мои клиенты, а это успешные деловые люди, все чаще стали обращаться ко мне с вопросами, связанны- ми с воспитанием детей. Я провела опрос, в котором участвова- ли 53 бизнесмена с состоянием от $100 миллионов до нескольких миллиардов. Большинство хотят видеть в детях своих преемников, способных принимать са- мостоятельные решения, ставить цели и достигать их, брать на себя ответ- ственность, обладать лидерскими ка- чествами. И, конечно, уважать и ценить родителей, уметь любить и дружить, с our child’s needs. He needs a response that is tailored «to his measure». One child might be happy with a «hello and bye», the other needs to be hugged, looked in the eyes and caressed. Our sensitivity will tell us what is the necessary dose of warmth and emotional support for each child. Isle of stability Education is not an exact science, but an art. Experts can do research and offer solu- tions. But it is up to parents to really know their child and feel his needs. Are we able to protect our children from negative influences? I am sure, we are. I do believe in «island education». It is one of the most efficient defense strategies. The family should act as an island for the child to realize his main needs — in love, understanding, support, security, knowing borders and freedom. He must be imbued with the fami­ly atmosphere. This has more effect than all the other educational strat- egies. An Island education will allow the child to mature, form as a person, become self-confident and self-sufficient, relying on family values. And our mission will thus be fulfilled. © http://dadsroundtable.com удовольствием учиться, развиваться. Однако это не всегда получается — ро- дители, обладающие огромными фи- нансовыми возможностями, не могут добиться положительных результа- тов. Почему? Исследования говорят о том, что се- годняшняя «привилегированная мо- лодежь» гораздо более уязвима, чем в предыдущих поколениях. Безграничное потребление, культ успеха, индивидуа- лизм, перфекционизм, конкуренция — все то, что отличает современное обще- ство, создает большие психологические проблемы. Для описания этих проблем Hello Monaco Winter 2018–2019 / 149