Lois Lane
Lives:
Future
Perfect
Kate Stone
I was reading Chris Allen’s fantastic letter to his 14 year old self when he first sent it in (and laughing
hysterically at the photo – you’ve definitely grown into your looks Intrepid!) and it made me think;
not so much about ‘what would I say to a 14 year old ME’ but rather ‘what would I say to a 14 year
old daughter, were I fortunate enough to have one?’
Children are not, as they say, in my stars; I am the favoured/honorary Aunt who swans in and
distributes gifts/advice/sympathy/love and then – big point here – hands the beloved monsters
back, even if parents of said cherubs have attempted to flee the country on fake passports and are
claiming I am their real mother. Nice try, persons who shall remain nameless. For now.
But – talking hypothetically – if there were to be a Mini Me…
8 May, 2028
Dear MM
Firstly, be thankful that I didn’t call you after a piece of fruit, a state of the US, a fish or an undergarment.
These were all possibilities and you would not have stood out in playgroup, and could well have gone on
to a successful career as a slashie (model/actress/singer) solely because you had a stupid name, although
I would have locked you in your room if you’d attempted any of these things before the age of 13.
No, you may not attempt them just because you have turned 14.
Because I said so.