An Application for the Team
www.GBMRT2016.org.uk
on a hot summer’s day. Whilst in many social circles this trait may be considered
undesirable, considering the majority of your potential team also suffer from this
problem, I cannot believe this trait to be a reason to decline my application.
Personal requirements of the tour would include somewhere warm and dry to sleep,
some form of meat to eat; throwing me the odd bone would be most appreciated
but not expected. I would come with my own bed, lead and brush. Team members
would be expected to carry and operate ‘GBMRT poop’ bags at all times. A GB
embroidered dog coat would make me look most glamorous within the labradoodle
dating scene but strictly please no diamond studs.
Whilst selecting a dog for an official GB team may be viewed mildly obscure by some
(mainly target rifle shooters) I believe selection would be in keeping with the spirit of
the match rifle community. My selection would emphatically confirm what is already
known on the Common; that you are a modern, forward thinking progressive
Captain. This decision would be no more forward thinking than, say, allowing Ladies
to shoot for England in the Elcho. Additionally I am definitely a team player and
would be most willing to repeatedly hump everyone’s leg to demonstrate this quality.
I await with keen interest your decision. If I am not selected I totally accept your
decision without a single bark, whimper, yelp or howl. If unselected it is likely my
master will send me to the local dog pound resulting in being rehomed to catch rats
in a small settlement in the Northern Territory.
Yours sincerely,
Paddy
Blair Atholl, Scotland, UK