GAZELLE MAGAZINE JANUARY 2018 | Page 49

HEARTH & HOME A large, airy kitchen with modern appliances is one point that most couples can agree on 3. Compare Your Checklists   Writing things down helps because you can read each other’s checklists and find the commonalities. Sometimes, in the middle of arguing, you cannot find a reason to agree with your spouse, and having everything in writing can mediate the conversation. You might just find that you agree on more features than you thought.  Use your checklists to talk about what you visualize daily life would be like in a new home. This way, you’re steering things more in the direction of a conversation, rather than an argument.   4. When It Comes to Budget, Look at the Facts  One of the biggest disagreements married couples face when buying a home is how much debt to take on. Money, debt, finances – all this can get any couple emotional and ready to argue. But there shouldn’t be a reason to fight if you just look at the numbers. Your mortgage payments should not exceed 25 percent of your take-home pay. So when your spouse thinks you can take on a high mortgage payment for a “dream home,” just share this practical advice – and leave emotion out of it.   5. Know that No Home is Perfect (and Few Homes are Forever)   Speaking of “dream homes,” it’s important to note that more times than not, you won’t find one home that fits all your desires. As marriage is about compromise, so is house hunting with your spouse. Compromise and the understanding that you probably won’t find that perfect home can give you more reason to come to an agreement with your spouse.  At the end of the day, house hunting with your spouse can strengthen your marriage. Make sure you understand your spouse’s thoughts and feelings and that he or she understands yours, and you’ll open the door to productive conversations – ones that lead to you both sharing a happy (not perfect) home.  Avoid the bickering, drama and resentment, and just learn to work together and agree on what will truly make a happy home for the both of you. SAVVY I SOPHISTICATED I SASSY 47