know ? I ’ m trying to find that balance and trying to be the best dad in the world .

Understandable . Fatherhood really does change your priorities and perspective on life .

For sure . I watched a documentary on the plane the other day about Tiger Woods . He spoke about his father and how his dad treated him , and I started crying . I really need to step this parenthood shit up and give it more effort . I provide everything for my kids , but that means nothing when they ’ re just missing their dad . My kids have every f ** king toy you can imagine , but Dad ’ s on the other side of the world for months talking to them on Skype and my three-year-old is saying “ Daddy , come home . Daddy , come home ” and it ’ s just heart wrenching .

It must be tough trying to find that balance though . How do you deal with that ?

Oh , life ’ s all about balance and the older I get the more shit I have to deal with and have to try and balance out . I have respect for every single human being and I love them all , but at the end of the day I always ask the questions “ Why are we here and what are we doing .” I love that my lifestyle is one of exploration . I never know what ’ s going to come along next and I think the only thing that ’ s going to limit that is my creativity . I feel like I ’ m on this earth to invent and create .

When you ’ re in the thick of creating these big projects that have never been done before , do they keep you awake at night ?

No they make me sleep well because I want to dream about them ! I try not to think too much , because that ’ s when the best ideas come to me . I ’ ve been through times where I ’ ve thought , “ I ’ m going to sit down with a pad and paper and come up with some good ideas ”, and then a few minutes later I ’ m filling the page with pictures of dicks . [ Laughs ]

Mindfulness is something I ’ ve learnt through this journey . It ’ s all about being present and paying attention to what you ’ re doing . I ’ ve learnt that through trial and error and self exploration of trying to push myself , that I go to bed now and I do some breathing techniques . Within two or three cycles I ’ m already in a deep shake-me-to-wake-me-up REM sleep .

I think we ’ re multidimensional beings that are having a physical experience at this point in time , but when you dream ,

that dream state is how you are when you ’ re dead . Shit ’ s still going on and you ’ re still having experiences , but not in the physical form .

OK , so what about when you ’ ve completed a big project like Pipedream ? Does the adrenalin keep you awake ?

Oh definitely . After a big stunt it ’ s hard to shut down . Once the adrenalin has run through me and I ’ ve achieved something , the pressure ’ s off and it takes a little while for the dust to settle again . I definitely feed off energy but I try to be mindful of that and try to function on my own frequency .

Obviously there ’ re some huge risks with these . Does that side of things worry you , especially with a family relying on you ?

That was kinda the reason I left FMX in the first place . When I was 16 I had viral meningitis and there were some brain injuries associated with that that developed into post-traumatic impact syndrome .

I didn ’ t know this , so back in the early days I crashed on a Nac and had a seizure and frothed at the mouth . The ambulance said I had complications on the way to the hospital where my heart stopped beating and they had to revive me .

Since then , after every massive impact I ’ ve had seizures , including at the last contest I rode at Sydney X-Fighters when I crashed in practice , had a seizure , then woke up in Westmead hospital .

A few weeks before Pipedream was released I crashed the BMX out the front of the house and actually died ; I had a seizure in my house and died on my way to hospital . They revived me and I came to two days before the premiere . I went to the premiere and had to do a media tour and talk about this film but I could barely speak and I couldn ’ t remember shit . When you spoke to me it seemed like I was on point , but memory was missing and my whole life was blurred .

I ’ ve been to a neurologist and he said neurologically I was fine , but I needed to reconsider my career because the next time I have one of these seizures I mightn ’ t come back the same person .

That shook me a bit and I ’ ve learnt to put stuff out of my mind , but this ate away at me , especially as I ’ ve got such a beat-up body from so many years of abuse . u

I ’ ve lost so many good friends , that for FMX , I ’ ve had my day . As far as dirt bikes in general go , I ’ m not done yet .

© Andrew Northcott

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