The End of the Worldfrom page 6
A new and great workout that would come to be second nature to me . The encouragement in that room is indescribable . And once Cor knows your name , look out ! You ' d better bring you ’ re A game because she sees everything ! She is there teaching , encouraging , correcting , and cheering you on every chance she gets . Who doesn ’ t want that !? It ’ s an hour or so that I think about nothing but what I ’ m supposed to be doing . Up down , step step , propel propel !!! Uno Mas !!! I know you can do it !! Words we can all use . It ’ s an hour or so a day , just for me ... it takes some work but I can do it ...... the entire class ... I ’ m back ! options . But truly there was no other choice . My husband came back to the doctor with me to be sure everything I heard was correct . He was in complete agreement . Of course he was , these were not his body parts being removed .
There were already more polyps inside , so the surgery had to be scheduled quickly because they needed to get them out and test them . I was scheduled within two weeks . I barely had time to process everything . I cried a lot , I mean , a real lot . I know , I was done having children and I no longer needed those
thought . I thought life with my husband would be different . My mom said to me “ You aren ’ t going to wake up 70 , all of those things happen gradually over time .” She was right . My husband just kept telling me that I had to do it because he needed me , our kids needed me , they all needed me here . This was the only sure bet that I would not get uterine , ovarian or cervical cancer . It all had to come out . Rationally I understood all of that . It was just hard to come to terms with .
Well , I came to terms with it , got it done , and I ’ m here to tell you , I really over-worried . I ’ m okay , better than okay . I am cancer free and will continue to be ! I am the last one to tell anyone that getting through it isn ’ t a process . It ’ s okay to be sad . Maybe I was sad because it was the first place my kids lived and I don ’ t have it anymore . It ’ s hard to say . Everyone will have a different feeling about it . Whatever the feeling , it is okay , it ’ s your feeling and you can ’ t be told not to have it .
Surgery in January , 2014 then 7 weeks of radiation and then 5 years of medication . I was put on tamoxifen , apparently a common treatment to prevent a reoccurrence of breast cancer , but not without its side effects . I get them all ! You hear " some women have no side effects ." Not this woman , I got them all . The worst of them is uterine trouble ! Trouble that could lead to cancer . I have to have tests and ultrasounds to check the status of my uterus and ovaries constantly to be sure there is no cancer growing in there from the medication . Seriously ??? Yes , seriously !
After a year or so of that , and one hospital procedure to " really get a good look ", they aren ’ t happy with what they see . They see polyps in my uterus . I have them removed and they just keep coming back . What could be next ? Yup , a radical hysterectomy . Again , I am devastated ! It ’ s optional , but not really , when all you hear the doctor saying is , “ it wasn ’ t a cancerous polyp .... this time .” I tried every which way to not have this next operation . I ’ ll get monitored more I promise . But that wasn ’ t enough .
I got a second opinion from a specialist who pretty much said ...” It ’ s gotta come out .” I thought ; What ? Did he just say that , like it was nothing ? Yes , nothing to him I thought . But he is an oncologist who sees it as a no-brainer . Let ’ s remove any of the parts that are susceptible to cancer , and your chances of NOT getting cancer there are now 100 %. He was stunned that my first reaction was , “ No thank you .” I really wanted to weigh it out , think about my
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I was put on tamoxifen , apparently a common treatment to prevent a reoccurrence of breast cancer , but not without its side effects .
I get them all !
particular parts , but still , they were mine . My friends all asked the same question , a good question . " Why are you crying ?" I wasn ’ t even really sure . I knew that I would wake up in menopause , so that certainly was not a thrilling thought . I was told I ’ d be going through it in about five years anyway . Yes , I agreed , but those 5 years are mine . My last 5 good years . That is really what I thought .
The thought of menopause to me and everything that went with it was frightening . All you know is what you read on the internet . So , stay off of the internet . I thought the strangest things , like I ’ d start growing all of this facial hair , get wrinkled , get fat , all of my skin would become droopy and I ’ d be sweating all the time from hot flashes . I am not kidding , this is what I
Summer 2016 FIT to Print
I had the surgery and took six weeks off . I felt okay after four and kept asking when I could go back to the gym . Same answer each time , in 6 weeks you can return to normal activity .. I returned six weeks to the day , to the class that I once found intimidating from the other side of the glass . I went back , and Cor welcomed me and the best people at the gym clapped and welcomed me back too ! I took it easy for a while . My friends would keep an eye on me to be sure I didn ’ t overdo it . Little by little I got back , every day . It ’ s been a year , and I don ’ t have any extra facial hair , I ’ m not all wrinkled , I didn ’ t gain a ton of weight , my skin isn ’ t droopy , and things with my husband are just fine ! The hot flashes are no fun , but not life altering .
To my family , my oldest friends , the friends that I have met through my children , who I ’ d be lost without , to my newest friends ( I never , ever would have thought that at this stage in my life , I ’ d still be making new friends .), thank you ! I am so grateful for you all . I made it , I really did , and I ’ m good , no great !
Jeannie Rocchio