being told to just go along with their narrow interpretations. I was able to build my own personal relationship with God, which is what He wanted in the first place.
I thought that if I prayed for an easy life, I would get it somehow. That wasn’t part of God’s plan. When my son Aidan was diagnosed with Autism at the age of 7, I thought that would be it for him. I worried that he would never be independent. He is now 16 and he will be heading off to college next year for 2 years of foundation studies, before he applies for the mainstream catering program. When my son Owen was 6 and was diagnosed with a learning difficulty and behaviour issues, I thought that he would never catch up. He is now 13 and excelling in quite a few of his lessons. He is also working hard to deal with his anger in a much better way.
I reached a point in 2012 where my low self-esteem and my bulimia reached a critical point and I went for help. I was seen by a psychologist who diagnosed me officially with extreme anxiety and serious (but not severe) depression. I found out that these were the triggers for my eating disorder. This was with an Eating Disorder clinic, so while I needed help with my anxiety and depression, my bulimia was severe enough for them to take me on as a patient. I felt like I was all alone and it was too much to deal with and I just had to keep going anyhow. I actually managed to lose some weight and so I felt more confident, but always at the edge of my thoughts was the worry that I would suddenly eat a cracker and balloon up like a Blow fish. I wasn’t ever truly happy, but I thought that I was getting better. I thought this was what God had given me. I know I don’t pray like I probably should. I do often meditate on God and think about God, especially over the past three years. During this time a lot of things have happened in my life and that of my family.
I should mention that back in 2009, we made a decision to leave Canada and move to the UK. My husband and I had reached a point in our relationship that we had to do something drastic or we would end up divorced. His grandparents were from England, so it was easy for us to come over on Ancestry Visas. It was a massive change for us, but even then, I knew it would be the right thing. We are now settled here as permanent residents and England is home. I would say that where we are in Essex (Brightlingsea) feels more like home to me than living in Canada ever did.
He came over to England in October 2009 and we joined him at the end of November 2009. We lived in Norwich in the county of Norfolk from 2009 until February 2016. At that time, we moved down to Brightlingsea in Essex, right along the coast. This was for my husband’s promotion at work. He has had two more promotions since we have lived here and my kids have made some great friends as well.
I have to say that the most drastic change in my life happened in March 2014 when I suffered a serious spinal injury. I can remember the day I suffered my spinal injury like it was yesterday. On 23-March-2014 I was taking laundry out of the tumble dryer and felt a huge sharp pain in my back. I couldn’t stand upright at all. I thought that it was just my sciatica acting up, so I sat down and took some painkillers. It got worse over the next couple of days, so I was taken to a walk-in-clinic and I was told to try TENS and painkillers. A week later I went to an Osteopath for an adjustment - I could hardly walk because I couldn’t stand upright. I had another adjustment a week later because my hips were out of line again. I then saw a massage therapist and finally was sent to my old GP in May. He recommended me for an
MRI, which I had in June. When I went back in July for the results I was told I had a prolapsed disc between my L4 and L5 vertebrae. I asked him what that meant in English and he said that the disc at the bottom of the Lumbar area of my spine had slipped and bulged out. He said it was probably a combination of having had two children, being over 40, the repetitive motion of bending and twisting to clean and do laundry and pick up after my kids. I - like every kid in Canada - had also fallen numerous times in the winter - sometimes slipping on ice, but usually wiping out while sledding. I also fell down our basement stairs back in Canada and fractured my tailbone, and this probably didn’t do me any favours either.
I was able to build my own personal relationship with God, which is what He wanted in the first place.
HELP GOD I CAN'T HANDLE THIS 53