5 PRACTICAL WAYS TO STOP JUDGING 21
critical, that's where we run into hot water. So it's not the mere act of making a judgement that's problematic, it's what you do with that judgement
Think of it this way: You can't always 100% control your first thought. Your second thought (and what you do with it) is what makes a difference.
You’ve probably heard the old adage that the things we hate in others are usually elements within ourselves that we hate on some level. This theory definitely seems true when we find ourselves jealous, hateful or envious of someone who possesses attributes that we wish we had, ourselves.
It’s a common reaction if you’re struggling with self-esteem and body image. Even if we generally try to be good people and support other women, many of us still find ourselves in situations where we catch ourselves out being super critical (and sometimes, even taking pleasure in that criticism). Here's what might be going on behind the scenes:
1. Insecurity.
This is one of the primary reasons for judgement. When we're feeling insecure and don't want to face those emotions, subconsciously we may instead project that onto other people. Tearing down others is never successful in building ourselves up, but that's a fallacy of insecurity. We want to feel good, and sometimes we try to make others feel bad my comparison to take the heat off ourselves.
2. Fear.
If we're intimidated or scared of someone, we might put them down or dismiss them to try and 'diffuse' their perceived threat to our lives. For instance, we might feel that insulting someone that we perceive as more attractive than ourselves is a sure-fire way to get others we care about to see
Judging other women's
bodies is a sure fire way
to make you feel even
more inferior