Family and Faith Magazine Easter, 2017 | Page 23

Family and Faith Magazine : What is your advice to women in a physically abusive relationship ?
Tricia-Anne Morris :

1 . The first thing you ought to do is find a safe space . One where you ' re

out of harm ' s way .

2 . Next report it to the police . Especially if he has threatened you or

you feel threatened .

3 . You should also tell a close friend , family member and / or pastor

( someone trustworthy and dependable ). This is very important because you ' ll need someone to check up on you and act as your accountability partner . Your accountability partner is the person you can trust to talk sense into you in the event you contemplate going back under the
circumstances and / or you start to blame yourself .

4 . It would also be good if you found a prayer group to share with .

A space where you ' re free to speak openly , honestly and confidentially . Verbalizing your pain , concerns , fears etc . will help you get rid of the
‘ toxins ’ from the relationship .

5 . You should also get professional help . See a pastor , therapist , or

counselor - someone that can help you get over the spiritual , psychological and emotional trauma . A great place for counselling is WOGIS Ministries International .

The truth is , as I opened up more and more to the idea of helping women , God cemented for me what my purpose is .”

6 . Finally , do things that will accelerate your healing process . My suggestions : a . Forgive yourself quickly b . Stay away from the blame game . Blaming yourself is wrong , there is no two ways about it . Even if you were the worst wife ever , he was wrong to abuse you . c . Forgive him quickly . Hating him is a great way to stay stuck . Anger and hate are energy depleting mechanisms . Make every effort to let go and move on ! d . Also once it ' s safe to do so , make every effort to live again ... Take on a hobby , invest in courses , volunteer , join a church ministry , and / or get involved in community service ... Getting involved will empower you which in turn will build your self-esteem . If you don ' t get involved you may find yourself

sinking further into depression and feelings of insecurity . 7 . Keep your distance from him , his friends and / or family members

until you are sure it ’ s safe to be in a shared space with him / them ( if at all ). Being in the same space may put you in harm ’ s way again . Doing so can be very risky . Also unless your spouse has sought help and can show overtime that he is a better man , he ' s not ready to be with you . It is a risk you ' ll have to assess seriously and only after YOU have also sought help and are in a much better place . A weak you will not hesitate to go back , even if it ’ s not safe . Be keen to listen to the advice of family members , your pastor , accountability partner , and prayer group . If they are opposed to you seeing him then it ’ s probably best not to .
My rule of thumb is : He ’ s not ready to change if he hasn ’ t sought prolonged professional help .
Family and Faith Magazine : How has your painful past helped you to find your true purpose ?
Tricia-Anne Morris : God is so amazing . As I went through my healing process I became empowered and then I became excited and eager to share what I had learnt and found in my search to a better me . So I started to think of ways to help other women and then I found myself being led by God in a particular direction . It was less about me seeking stuff out and more about Him taking me on a journey . Out of that journey came my book but it still felt like there was more . So I prayed more , fasted and just submitted it all to Him . In no time the ideas came flooding and the doors started opening . The truth is , as I opened up more and more to the idea of helping women , God cemented for me what my purpose is . So now I do success coaching , business coaching . I ’ m author , radio host , business consultant , blogger and I host an annual conference for women . In fact , my key target is women . What ’ s funny is that I ’ m now writing a book about finding purpose based on the ‘ formula ’ as it were , that God gave me .
You can purchase Tricia-Anne ’ s book on Amazon http :// amzn . to / 2o0yYwp and at Barnes and Noble http :// bit . ly / 2o4ZlfS . You may also get in touch with her directly via email at tricia . awminc @ gmail . com or follow her on Facebook , Instagram and Twitter at @ triciaanneymorris
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