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The hole in my heart was huge and nothing I did would repair it . So I turned to sex , partying , and promiscuity . However , once I became a Christian and accepted that I had been redeemed , had a new life , and was made a new creature , my life and perspective changed dramatically .”
Family and Faith Magazine : You describe yourself as a ' Jesus Chaser ', share with our readers what that means on a day to day basis .
Tricia-Anne Morris : Chasing Jesus means doing whatever I can to deepen my connection to Him . So I do simple things like say good morning when I wake up as I would any loved one . We also talk throughout the day like Father and daughter - when I need advice , a shift in my mood and a word of encouragement . Then sometimes there are those moments when I need to apologize to Him ( and the person I offended ) because my attitude , reaction , or thoughts were un-Jesus like . I also tell Him thanks throughout the day and let Him know how grateful I am for life , my family , my business , lessons learned etc . I do devotions . I ' m not a morning person so I do my devotions at lunch time or before bed . My devotions will include reading and meditating on the Bible , praying , listening to worship music . More importantly , it ' s when I learn a whole lot about Him . Outside of devotion time I may listen to gospel music or watch sermons .
Family and Faith Magazine : Share one example of how you ' ve experienced redemption from sin in your own life ?
Tricia-Anne Morris : I remember going through a very rough patch in my life . And that rough patch left me struggling with low self-esteem and mild depression . I didn ' t know Jesus then . I didn ' t know how to turn my sadness into joy with His help . The hole in my heart was huge and nothing I did would repair it . So I turned to sex , partying , and promiscuity . However , once I became a Christian and accepted that I had been redeemed , had a new life , and was made a new creature , my life and perspective changed dramatically . Because of His redemption I felt like a brand new white suit . I ' m talking tailormade , dry cleaned , steam-pressed , crisp full white suit , white buttons - everything white . I felt like everything that was wrong about me , every situation that had hurt me , everything I did wrong had vanished ( was wiped clean from my story ) because of Jesus ' blood and death .
Family and Faith Magazine : You were in a broken abusive relationship , what has God shown you about abuse and how women should treat men and men women ?
Tricia-Anne Morris : A man is supposed to love his wife as Jesus loved the church . Jesus died for the church , protected the church , provided for the church . This is the model husbands should follow . As such , husbands should never intentionally harm their wives . Furthermore they should protect her ( keep harm away from her ) and provide for her .
As I prayed about my own situation the Lord showed me that I was also wrong in the relationship . He made it very clear that abuse was wrong . So He wasn ’ t saying that I deserved it . He was merely saying that I was wrong too .
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If the man has no money and we go ahead and pay the bills without having the conversation with him first , we ’ re usurping his authority .”
Ladies , in our efforts to see things run smoothly and care for our family we ( women ) sometimes usurp the man ’ s authority . If the man has no money and we go ahead and pay the bills without having the conversation with him first , we ’ re usurping his authority . The primary responsibility of providing for the home is his and unless that conversation is had and we ’ ve both agreed … we ’ re undermining his authority and disrespecting him . We ’ re saying he ’ s incapable . Funny thing is we often don ’ t mean anything by it . We ’ re usually just trying to help out but that still doesn ’ t make it right . A wife should always be on the same page with her husband and to do that she needs to have that conversation – the one that includes him and shows him that he matters and is the man . Another example is asking him to do something , say fix a pipe , and because we don ’ t think he ’ s getting around to it fast enough , we call for the plumber without having that conversation - usurping his authority .
You know the key I learned from the Lord as we talked through and I self-evaluated is that I am not meant to be the man in the relationship . Don ’ t get me wrong . I do believe that I can do what a man does in a professional capacity , academically , and even earn what he earns . That however will never make me a man . And I am very happy being a woman . So I have come to realize that his roles are his and mine are mine and I have to respect his as much as he needs to respect mine . Took me a while to understand that , particularly because I never realized that what I was doing was wrong . Nevertheless I ’ ve since learnt and very much appreciate the lesson .
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A man ( or woman ) who lacks self-control is more likely to give in to the impulse to argue a lot , ‘ blow his or her top ’, and as you can imagine over time that may lead to abuse .”
Family and Faith Magazine : How is self-control important in determining if a man has a tendency to abuse his partner ?
Tricia-Anne Morris : Self-control is having the discipline to control your impulses , emotions , thoughts and behaviours . Someone who lacks self-control doesn ' t have that discipline . Yet in marriage both persons have to be mature enough to know when to compromise , to agree to disagree , and not ' be right ' even when you are right . When you lack self-control it ' s hard to do these things that are so critical to keeping the marriage together and keeping the peace . A man ( or woman ) who lacks self-control is more likely to give in to the impulse to argue a lot , ‘ blow his or her top ’, and as you can imagine over time that may lead to abuse .
22 familyandfaithmagazine . com