OVERCOMING CHILDHOOD TRAUMA:
VICTORY OVER THE SPIRIT OF ANGER
written by
Shamekia Graham
When I became a mother and a wife, specific
experiences from my childhood begin to manifest
themselves, and those symptoms tried to take control
of my life. As a child, I grew up without a mother or
father and because of their absence, rape stole my
innocence. I had no one to confide in during those
critical years. And as a coping mechanism, I kept
specific problems bottled up, allowing various infirmities
to take root. Those defeats blossomed in the form of
bitterness, shame, and unworthiness.
Fast forward into adulthood, and those character flaws
festered into feelings of failure, suicidal thoughts,
struggle, and anger. As a mother, I wanted to protect
my children from anyone or anything that could hurt
them—even my painful past. In trying to protect my
legacy, I wrestled even the more with the spirit of
anger. Because when issues are not dealt with
properly, they tend to show up uninvited.
Over the years, I experienced moments of yelling and
throwing things and when my child mocked me during a
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moment of pouting; my eyes were open to how much I
needed to transform inwardly and outwardly as a wife and
mother. God told me if I did not allow Him to heal me, then
this curse would continue through my seed. So I opened
myself up wholeheartedly unto the Lord and released every
ounce of hurt, disappointment, shame, and guilt.
My anger continued to grow because I deeply hid it causing
it to manifest in other ways through isolation and
complaining. Once and for all, I had to deal with the root of
my anger. It took genuine consistency and effort on my part
to break free. I stayed in God’s presence worshipping and
studying His Word. I would fast and pray to be in a position
to hear directions clearly from the Lord. The ultimate act
that transformed my life was obedience. Through worship,
compliance, and discovering I had the authority over the
spirit of anger; I was set free. Though I am no longer in
bondage, I still contend with the residue at times. It is in
those moments that God shows me when that spirit rises
against me, I must submit to his leading, and those spirits
must flee. I have power over my situation and so do you! Do
not let rebellious spirits control you. Be set free.