My list only contains three of the major outward signs . Gangfree , a non-profit organization devoted to ridding America of its gang problem , provides an extensive list of sixteen signs a child may be in a gang . Parents need to familiarize themselves with this list and use it as a guide for observing their child .
What should parents do when they discover their child is in a gang ?
The first thing a parent should do is pray for guidance because the last thing a parent wants to do is further alienate their child . Once the parent is “ all prayed up ,” then they should speak to the child in patience and love about their observations and concerns . The purpose of this conversation should be two-fold : to first hear about the child ’ s fears which led him / her to the gang in the first place , and then to explain some of the dangers of gang affiliation . Be sure to offer advice on other ways a child can achieve their goal . Getting your child to divulge his / her reasons for joining a gang is the first step in laying out a plan to extricate your child from the gang . Since some of these gangs can be violent , parents may have to solicit the assistance of the local police department . It is very possible that a parent may have to move the child or the family to the other side of town .
As much as possible , parents must make a determination that they will begin providing those qualities that the child was looking for from the gang .
• Be there . On school evenings be present and engaged with the children . Make being home fun . Do activities together : Monday — watch a favorite show , Tuesday-make it a game night , Wednesday , offer homework help , on Thursday , spend some ‘ Let ’ s Talk ’ time , and on Friday make it a movie night . Don ’ t ’ make family conversation about the drudgery of work . Make it about enjoying each other . Let the kids come up with some of the activities .
• Have the tough talks . In addition to the birds and the bees , the topic of gangs has to be another talk parents must have with their children .
• Bible study . Family bible studies should also be incorporated into the program . Church may have a wonderful Sunday School program , but there is nothing like a bible study led by a parent . Parents can provide a new twist on the subject by showing how Jesus himself was in a gang . He was the recruiter and leader of one of the “ baddest ” gangs ever .
Jesus as gang leader .
• He recruited a limited number in his posse , twelve .
• He trained them on how to live , to pray , to heal , and to show compassion
• While only 12 were in his core group , everyone who wanted to could be a member
• He gave up his life for his members so nobody anywhere ever would have to do so for theirs .
• He spoke in code : parables .
• He is still looking to recruit .
Use Jesus and the Gospel of John to get your child to see the power of ( re ) joining “ The Jesus Posse .” Making the bible relevant to the world of your young child is key to helping him / her see the relevancy of the gospel message . There are additional steps that a parent might have to make .
Changes parents may have to make
• If church-going has not been a regular practice in the household , then that must change . Parents and their ex-gang affiliated son or daughter must begin attending church . ( And , yes , girls do join gangs .) The church should have a strong youth department .
• If there is no strong youth department in the church , consider starting a community young people ’ s meeting that convenes on a weekday evening . When I was in high school , I attended High School Born- Againers ( Hi- BA ) group . We met on Thursday evenings in the same volunteer household and engaged in exuberant bible study and always left with a home-made cookie or cup cake . I am not sure if Hi-BA still exists , but the concept can be duplicated : a young enthusiastic leader , bible study , enthusiastic singing , prayer , refreshments , home . So much could be achieved within that hour : a growing faith , safety environment , and social networking . This is a pretty good weekday activity even if there is a vibrant Sunday School in the family church .
Very often we ask God to put a hedge around our children , but maybe we need to alter that prayer and ask God to show us how we can help build that hedge ourselves . When raising our children in a large urban