Not only did it bring an immedia t e end to whatever argument they ’ d been involved in , but I got housework done to boot ! It was a win-win . We needed that jar for only a few WEEKS . Yes , you read that right . The girls were so averse to the consequences of squabbling that they STOPPED the behavior . Remember this : Despite protests to the contrary , children really can control themselves and change a poor pattern of interaction — even if it seems set in stone . Trust me . It ’ s not . I even started to anticipate their squabbles with a new sense of satisfaction — if they fought , something positive would come from it , in the form of finished chores !
So make out a list of chores , get your jar , and let them know the new paradigm . For now on , if they make you miserable ( or just make each other miserable ), they have to pay for it with work . Sound too simple ? Well , you could find whole books on the subject of handling sibling squabbling , no doubt about it . There are experts in psychology , psychiatry , parenting and family relationships who could all probably chime in with valuable information . But here ’ s what I can say about this “ unofficial ” method from a woman whose expertise is not in social sciences — it worked !
Pray for wisdom as you create your chore list . For some kids , telling them to sit down and read a chapter of a book might be an apt consequence . Use what you know about your children to make this method as effective as