teach them , can we ? The Bible states that is exactly what we are not to do . Do not be yoked together with unbelievers . For what do righteousness and wickedness have in common ? Or what fellowship can light have with darkness ? 2 Corinthians 6:14 Believers are called to bolster each other up , to pray for each other , and to teach each other the ways of Truth . Especially to our kids
But what happens when church members lock horns ? The church is a family , and can at times be just as dysfunctional as a flesh and blood one . We are all sinners in need of a Savior and personalities will clash . Options will differ . Sides will want to be taken . How should Christians handle this ?
The obvious answer is to handle it in love the way Christ loves us . Easier said than done . However , Scripture does give us guidelines . The first is found in the Lord ’ s Prayer . “ Forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those who trespass against us .” Until the process of forgiveness can begin , little will be resolved . Forgiveness does not rely on emotion to fuel it . Forgiving another is an action one decides to take . Our Lord laid out how we are supposed to act when we are rubbed the wrong way by a fellow believer :
But I tell you that anyone who is angry with a brother or sister will be subject to judgment .… Therefore , if you are offering your gift at the altar and there remember that your brother or sister has something against you , leave your gift there in front of the altar . First go and be reconciled to them ; then come and offer your gift . Matthew 5:21,23-24 We cannot fully worship and receive God ’ s blessings when anger or prejudice or envy covers our heart . Our kids learn by example . If we , as adults , can reconcile differences and admonish each other in love , then they will begin to imitate us . The church is in the business of reconciliation and because God forgives our sins through the blood of Christ shed on the cross , we are called to be Christ-like to each other and do the same . Paul admonished the Corinthians for taking each other to court to settle their disputes . In 1 Corinthians 6 , he writes :
If any of you has a dispute with another , do you dare to take it before the ungodly for judgment instead of before the Lord ’ s people ? Or do you not know that the Lord ’ s people will judge the world ? And if you are to judge the world , are you not competent to judge trivial cases ? Do you not know that we will judge angels ? How much more the things of this life ! Therefore , if you have disputes about such matters , do you ask for a ruling from those whose way of life is scorned in the church ? ( vs 1-4 )
He calls them to settle it amongst themselves in a manner worthy of the Gospel . He tells them a few chapters later ( 1Corinthians 8:9-13 ) to act in such a manner that it is not a stumbling block for the weaker members of the congregation . That means newer believers , and definitely our children . Scripture also tell us if we suspect a person is in error in their actions or teachings , to go to that person in private , and if they do not listen , to then go in confidence and approach them again with another believer . If that doesn ’ t resolve the issue , get the elders involved . ( Matthew 18:15-17 ) But by no means are we to stew , let the sun set on our anger , gossip about it to others , or harbor a grudge .
Congregations need to cling together and not waste energy fighting amongst themselves , but instead learn to love , forgive and resolve issues quickly before grudges wrap their tentacles around hearts . The devil loves nothing more than to divide and isolate . Yes , someone may have to be corrected in their actions and thinking , and consequences or punishment may be appropriate , but it must be done in love .
And we urge you , brothers and sisters , warn those who are idle and disruptive , encourage the disheartened , help the weak , be patient with everyone . Make sure that nobody pays back wrong for wrong , but always strive to do what is good for each other and for everyone else . 1Thessalonians 5:14-15
At the end of the day , even if there has been strife and differences of wills , families should hug . So should it be in our churches so our children feel safe , secure and accepted . They are our extended family and we should extend love , forgiveness and fellowship to each , as Christ does for us .