Epunchng - Most read newspaper in Nigeria Sunday, August 13, 2017 - Page 44

Sunday Family I always kneel to beg my husband anytime he is angry — Abija’s wife Yoruba actor, Tajudeen Oyewole, popularly called Abija, is married to Ramotalai, a businesswoman. They talk about their 26-year-old union with TOLUWANI ENIOLA H  ow did you meet your wife? Abija: I met her while she was in secondary school in Igangan, a town in Oyo State. It was around 1989. I fell in love with her immediately I saw her. I later told her I love her and that I would like to marry her. I was already a popular actor then so I was surprised when she turned down my request. She was of good character. That was what attracted me to her. Aside from that, she came from a good home. You know most women won’t accept your proposal immediately. She refused and said she was not interested. She feared that as an actor, I would have other women. She believed that actors are promiscuous. Why did you initially reject his proposal? Ramotalai: I rejected his proposal because at first, marriage was not on my mind at the time. Also, I feared marrying a celebrity because I believed they are all promiscuous. But after my examinations, I came to Agege in Lagos and we met again. He immediately renewed his earlier proposal. When did you marry? Abija: We got married three years after we met in 1989. It took her three months to accept my proposal. Ramotalai: He was 30 or 32. He is eight years older than I am. My father was an Islamic priest from Ilorin, Kwara State. Since he is a Muslim too, my parents felt we would be compatible. I later told him I love him after his persistence. If he were a Christian, my parents might have objected to the marriage. He is a caring person and I think that drew me to him. I am the very jealous type. I am also hot tempered. I reasoned that if I marry him, God would use the marriage to remove jealousy and anger from me. When you marry a celebrity, you will learn to overcome jealousy because you will be careful as your spouse is well loved by many people, including women. When my parents agreed, they asked me if I like him and I said yes. God answered it all. It is beyond my understanding. The proposal was not a detailed or romantic one. When God decides something, you have no option. Marriage was not even in my plan then. I was 24 years old at the time. In movies, you usually play the role of herbalist constantly doing good and fighting dark forces. What kind of person are you at home? Abija: I am a completely different person at home. My father was an Ifa priest. I was born into traditional practice as well as hunting. I love my children and they love me as well. When I travel, they miss me a lot because they love me more than their mother. I look at how they relate between me and their mother. Ramotalai: He is a perfect gentleman at home. In our street, many people used to say they thought he is temperamental like he does in movies. Children on our street flood our homes whenever he is around. He has a good mind. If someone comes to him for help and I tell him what we have is for tomorrow, he will say, do you know tomorrow. Let us give it out. He is extremely generous. How do you settle quarrels at home? Abija: When there is true love between a couple, quarrels are easy to settle. She loves what I love. I love what she loves too. There is no way you can avoid disagreements or quarrels in a marriage. But when they occur, we have a way of settling them. When we have quarrels, we don’t make it known to the public. Ramotalai: I kneel to beg him when he is angry. When he is angry, he would be vibrating the way he does in movies. In the midnight, I would be on my knees and ask him to forgive me. Whenever he offends me, he has this funny way of pacifying me too. When I am angry, my body would be shaking and he knows how to calm me down. True love overlooks his excesses. 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