2. Have a bedtime ritual, which will help children slowly calm down, and allow them to associate certain activities with getting sleepy. Think about what calms your child. Is it taking a bath? Reading a story? Listening to soft music? Always do the bedtime preparation in the same order, and ask your child questions such as, “What do we do after we put on our pajamas?” A great item to include in the bedtime ritual is that of talking about your day. Let your child tell you what he did that day, and prompt him if he forgets. This part of the routine not only helps children with memory, time orientation, and language skills, but it also shows them that you care about what they did that day.
3. Include preparation for transitions in the routine. For example, say, “We have 10 minutes left before we start getting ready for bed. When the big hand gets to the 12, it will be time to put on your pajamas.”
4. Work together to make pictures that indicate each step of the routine, put the pictures in order on a colorful sheet of paper, and hang the finished product in your child’s room. You will not only be helping build creativity in your child, but you will also promote self-sufficiency, as your child will be able to look at the pictures to identify what step comes next.
5. Although routine is very important for young children, do not be too rigid. Children do need to learn how be flexible and deal with minor changes. If there is an interruption to the routine, tell your child, “I know we usually do x, but today we are going to do y because (reason). Tomorrow we will go back to our usual schedule.” If most of their day is predictable, young children will be able to deal with small changes, especially if they are prepared for the changes and see you modeling calm behavior as you deal with problems that occur.
It is never too late to start a routine. You set a good example for your child when you tell her, “The way that we have been doing things has not been working. We are going to try something new. Here is our new schedule.” While you should definitely be open to the fact that the schedule may need some adjustment, you also need to be firm in sticking to the new routine. At first, your child will try to get you to break the routine, but do not give in to old habits. Young children need both consistency and limits. Know ahead of time that your child will have difficulty adjusting, and be prepared with how you will handle this resistance.
The earlier that you begin to order your child’s life, the easier it will be. When you stick to a routine, you teach your child how to arrange her time in a manner that is efficient, productive, and cuts down on stress. This sense of order is not only important for making your young child feel secure at this moment, but it will also allow your child to internalize an automatic sense of how to organize her own life as she grows up.