DOZ Show Preferred Guest
SARAH FEHR
Interview by Eturuvie Erebor (AKA Gabriella)
Sarah Fehr is our DOZ Show Preferred
Guest for this issue of DOZ Magazine.
Sarah is a teacher, a writer, an author,
and a wife and mother. She is the author
of the book, Heart Scar, which she wrote
following her son’s battle for his life. About
eight years ago, her son was born with a
heart condition called Transposition of the
Great Arteries. Shortly after his birth, he
underwent a 16-hour surgery. During the
procedure, his heart stopped beating, and
the surgeon had to reach in and manually
pump the heart to get it working
again. Three years later,
Sarah wrote the book,
Heart Scar, detailing
her son’s experience.
In this interview,
which is an excerpt
from DOZ Show
Episode 54, Sarah
shares with us her
journey through what
was no doubt the darkest
moment of her life when
she didn’t know if her baby
would live or die. She shares
her story to give hope to
mothers everywhere facing
a similar predicament. Be
inspired to find purpose even
amid your battles!
DOZ Magazine | June 2019
Sarah, shortly after your son,
Trace was born, he had a
challenge with his breathing
which led to him having a heart
surgery during which his heart
stopped working and had to
be manually pumped by the
surgeon. Will you please share
with us that experience?
Yes. It was probably one of the
most difficult experiences of my
life in that the trauma that was
involved. First of all, to give you a
little bit of background, his heart
defect is called transposition
of the great arteries. So, the
pulmonary artery and the aorta
that go in and out of the heart
were switched. So the blood
normally goes out to the body
and then comes back to be re-
oxygenated and then sent back
out again but that blood wasn’t
getting back to the heart, and
then the blood that was being
oxygenated just continued to loop
through and never got carried
out to the body. So, they were
doing the opposites of what they
were supposed to be doing. And
he also had what they call a
14
ventricular septal defect, a hole
between the bottom chambers of
his heart. And that actually was
a good thing at the beginning
because it allowed some of that
blood to mix so that he did get
some of the re-oxygenated blood.
So in a way that was kind of a
blessing in disguise. But what
they had to do then for the
surgery, was to switch those two
arteries; cut them, switch them,
and also to put a patch in for the
ventricular septal defect. So it
was supposed to take about eight
to nine hours, and we were at the
children’s hospital, Illinois. They
did a really good job keeping us
updated on what was going on;
they would have someone come
and kind of report how things
were going. And it was going very
well for most of the time. And
then about the time that we were
thinking it would be winding
up, some of the reports started
to be like, well, the surgeon is a
little bit concerned about some
things, he wants to keep Trace
in the OR, he’s not ready to bring
him out to the PICU yet because
there are a few things he wants
All photos submitted by Sarah Fehr
to watch. Of course, he didn’t give us
specifics, so we didn’t know exactly
what was going on, but it ended up
being like sixteen hours of surgery
and was about two or three in the
morning by the time the surgeon
came up and talked to us. So he told
us that he had made the repairs;
the switch and then the patch. He
had gone ahead and closed Trace’s
chest, sewed it back up and then he
got this kind of sense that something
wasn’t quite right. He didn’t really
give us the specifics but for one, he
was an excellent surgeon and two,
I believe the Spirit of God nudged
him to because what happened next
was that he opened the chest back
up because he was not comfortable
with what was going on; he wanted
to open again so that he could see if
he needed to do anything else. And
then not long after that, Trace’s
heart did actually stop, and because
the chest was open, the surgeon
could just literally revive and get the
heart pumping again. Now, had he
been closed up and already back at
the PICU, we, I think probably, would
have lost him. Because they wouldn’t
have been able to get back in as
quickly, so it was really a miracle
that he came through and that God
chose for us to keep him. So it was
quite a journey, and it’s interesting
to think that there’s a reason that
he’s here today because that was a
miracle that he made it through.
While you were pregnant, was
there any clue, any sign that your
baby would have this sort of health
challenge at birth?
No. There was not. I had a regular
pregnancy; I had sonograms at
the normal times that you have
them. Everything measured fine,
everything was always fine, so there
was no indication at all beforehand,
and once we got to the children’s
hospital Illinois and were talking
with the cardiologist, we asked him,
is this something that should have
been caught and wasn’t? Is it usually
caught? And he said that in these
cases, the transposition of the great
arteries, about half the time it is
caught in the sonograms beforehand,
but half the time it’s not. This was
of course about eight years ago; I
don’t know if it would have been
different if it was present day or not.
But I think part of the difficulty is
the baby’s position can make it hard
to see things and who’s reading the
sonogram, how much experience
they have. So, I think different factors
play into whether or not they catch
it. And with transposition, he wasn’t
missing a part of his heart it was just
they were switched, so I think it’s a
little more difficult to detect.
Many women go through postnatal
depression even when their babies
are fi ne; your baby had to fi ght for
his life from day one. As a mother
and as a fi rst-time mother, how did
that impact you? Did you fall into
post-natal depression? Did you feel
like it was your fault? Did you blame
yourself?
Thankfully I have a wonderful family
and support system; good friends,
good church family, and I had quite
a few people that I felt like I could
always reach out to. My mum and
dad at that point in time lived just
fifteen or twenty minutes away from
us, so she came over a lot, and my
husband’s family also came to visit.
So I kind of always felt there was
someone I could bounce things off
of. But it was this kind of burning
question, like okay I don’t even know
how normally things go with babies,
and now I’ve got this child that I
need to be aware of if something
abnormal is happening. But it was
definitely stressful for me, but he did
have quite a few appointments and
check-ups, both with the cardiologist
and paediatrician, so I did feel that
I had people I could call if I had
questions.
Okay. So, a good support network
was in place, but how did his
condition impact on your very new
marriage?
It was interesting how it worked.
My husband and I were both
very overwhelmed with all the
information, trying to grasp what
was going on, we ran home to get
some clothes, and then someone
drove us over to the children’s
hospital, and yes, we were staying
15
with my sister who was not too
far away. They had a room in the
basement that we were using. It was
really stressful on both of us, but I
believe that it also really brought
us together in a way that trials
sometimes do. They kind of strip
away the mundane things of life
that maybe used to bother you or
are annoying, you know those things
just kind of slip away because you’re
both united in this one goal of your
child getting better. I want to say
that, that’s one of the best times of
our marriage as far as our closeness
with each other so it’s interesting
how the hard times can really bring
you together as a couple. Once we
got home, then it was a little more
stressful because I was trying to take
care of the baby and he would be at
work, and it was a little harder to
connect just like with any new baby
and that time it was a little more
difficult, after we got home and
things returned to normal. But all in
all, again family-friends support was
wonderful in that way.
Earlier on, you did mention being
a bit fearful and wondering if you
would lose your son. So, when it
came to taking care of him on a day
to day basis, how did you deal with
this fear? How did you overcome
the fear?
Well, until probably the last week or
two that he was in
the
hospital, there
was always
kind of the
possibility
that
something
could go
wrong,
and we
could lose
him. After
the initial
surgery, like
I said it took
till about
four o clock
the next
DOZ Magazine | June 2019