D'office Threads November 2014 | Page 37

The behaviour of a Gentleman

by Luke Dawson

„A gentleman would be ashamed should his deeds not match his words“

Confucius (551–479 BC) Chinese teacher

Even the notion of discussing gentleman behaviour is something hardly thought of any more. The idea originates from what I have seen growing up in an urban city. It is a simple fact -many men just don't have any manners any more ! No, this is not the Mr. Darcy like chivalry written by Jane Austen, I am talking about. It is just simple manners, nothing fancy or flashy – just plain old manners.

Looking good like a gentleman is one thing, acting like one is another. . A smartly dressed man is seen as conservative and snobby. When dressing smartly, I often get comments like if I am going somewhere special or for an interview. My reply as always – no I just like to dress well. As it is - it seems un-cool, out-dated and even women feel uncomfortable with a courtliest man. Nowadays holding a door open for a women is classed as flirty or even for that matter just been pleasant and well-mannered is considered as chivalry of the 1800s.

But, what of a modern gentleman ? This doesn't mean dressing up in frack or quoting Downtown Abbey. Simple things – your Ps and Qs, offering up your seat, letting someone ahead in the que, helping a stranger out or just even smiling- might not seem much, but these things although simple are almost forgotten in a busy lives.

I do truly believe that many men have just simply forgotten what it means to be a nice. A gentleman can look like anything – its not about what you wear, but how you feel in it. A gentleman's behaviour though is universal. There is no substitute for please and thank you.

So if you like me, believe we would help everybody, if us men, just acted a bit nicer, dressed a bit smarter and smiled a bit more often - then let us try a little harder, our women spend hours a day in front of the mirror - its the least we can do, right, gentlemen ?

#30 - A Gentleman is not a term, a book or an idea. It's a way of life.