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The thoughts of leaving her Congregation also tormented her. Her Confessor warned her
that she might be making a heretical move, facing the risk of excommunication. She felt intense
anguish, as if her flesh was being torn away from her soul and was helpless about it all.
She made repeated soulful pleas to God to save her, yet, no answer. Later, she was
inspired to submit her will wholly to God. Yes, not her will, but only His Will be done. As she
went for Holy Communion, suddenly, God’s powerful Presence permeated her being again.
Then, at the instance of Holy Communion, she felt so enraptured by the Lord within her that she
became temporarily oblivious about her surroundings.
(9.3) On Suffering Abandonment in Union with Christ’s Agony in the Garden
(Diary, # 1053): During Holy Mass, on Holy Thursday on March 25, 1937, Sr. Faustina
“saw the Lord” and then heard Him say, “Lean your head on My breast and rest.” The Lord
pressed me to His Heart and said, “I shall give you a small portion of My Passion, but do not be
afraid, be brave; do not seek relief, but accept everything with submission to My will.”
(Diary, # 1054): Then as Jesus’ consoling and peaceful Presence ceased, immediately, Sr.
Faustina felt flooded with unspeakable pain of God’s abandonment, as if almost all of her bodily
strength was sapped from her. She quickly ran out of the chapel to her bed. She then became
totally unaware of her surroundings except for her great inner turmoil. She ached for His tender
company. Jesus’ heartbeat no longer echoed in her soul. Instead, she sensed His Divine Heart’s
utmost disdain towards her, which further intensified her longing and pain. She lost all appetite
for food through the evening. She felt wounded even more when she saw Jesus Himself enduring
untold suffering, the One whom she loved with all of her heart and soul. Yet, she was powerless
to do anything about it.
On the same Holy Thursday, Sr. Faustina additionally suffered in an extraordinary way.
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