Crown of Beauty Magazine The Brave Issue | Page 60

make it” has been a huge part of my life. I can look confident on the outside now, but the truth is that I still wear all black and sweat, I still get sick to my stomach, and I still dread making work-related phone calls. The difference is that now, I know I'm capable of doing it all despite how much I hate it.

Courage is not the absence of fear. Courage is being willing to face things we must regardless of how much they terrify us. The Bible tells us that God has not given us a spirit of fear. To let fear consume and control us is essentially to let the devil win. It is telling God we don't think He's bigger, stronger, and more important than what scares us.

I wasted years of my life being afraid of what might happen if I did the things God wanted me to do most. Today, I play piano for church, I take part in theater performances, sometimes in lead roles, and I write for the newspaper, which involves lots of phone calls and interviews with people I've never met. I don't do any of this because I'm a strong person, or because I have an extra dose of talent. I can do these things because I finally let God take the wheel and be bigger than fear. And believe me, those fears are pretty huge.

Of course, anxiety still seeps in. Every single day. Each

morning is a new decision to let fear win or to let the courage that only comes from above win. I don't always make the right decision. But thank God, He gives us another opportunity with each sunrise.

The homeschool group I was in when I was younger always had an end of the year program, in which students would display in front of parents,

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