ground. Knowing I couldn't keep it there I began picking it up and putting the pieces of my life into bags I'd had in that same back-back of my car.
Now there were pieces of pieces of my past lying around me on the white-blue stones of Rye Beach. As if I had a powerful magnet pulling me away from the ground, there were certain items that seemed to want me to leave them right there where they fell. Who might find these treasures some day? I drove back up the coast to my favorite spot on the shore. Here again
I pulled two heavy plastic bags of memories from the car and planned my journey over the rock cliffs. Bags rip when they're filled and heavy with old, shards of the past that I have held onto too long, and things spill out as I walk the new roads I'm meant to travel: broken hearts, torn wings, masks, strands of fabric from an ancestor stick I made long ago, meant to lie in a November forest in 2007, but carried instead, like a torch keeping the past well lit. I walked in balance up and down the ancient stones and found the place I would lay my past to rest.
The sun began to fall in the west. The wind carried voices of children, ocean waves, and frustrated Mothers adding middle names to show they were serious about one, last swim and we're leaving. This summer I have said goodbye too many times. This Saturday I will say Goodbye, for now, to the boy I birthed 19 summers ago. Before I moved to my new place in early August I released everything in the house I was not in love with. Today I left the past on the cliffs of a beautiful shore.
The Great Mother of us all teaches me to rise and fall with deep breaths, to receive and to l
et go, even when I want to hold on for dear life to the ending of what I love. May there be acceptance and peace in my heart as I step
onto the new roads. May there be a lighter feeling in me, having released the past. May I create a comfort shawl of all these beautiful memories to use on cold or lonely nights, but one that can also be like a tapestry cloak of joy that celebrates every single moment of my life that has brought me to this summer shore of late-August - this beautiful moment. Great Mother may I step forward and know that
doing so will take nothing away from anyone
or anything in my past. May we all be blessed and grateful.