ADVICE_____________________________________________________________
At its worst, it acts as an always-on
nightmare portal into gloomy world
news and other people enjoying
themselves or saying something
infuriating on a loop, forever. In saying
that, there are also many benefits about
social media. For example: making
connections and moments of humanity.
While I’m still figuring this out myself, I
think it’s about knowing the balance. It’s
about recognising the moment when it’s
simply not fun anymore – and then
actually doing something about it.
With most challenging things in life, we
can’t press the exit button when it stops
being fun. In a job we hate, in a relationship
we’re unhappy about, or an impossible
family situation, financial difficulties, health
problems… None of these things can be
made to go away at will with an off switch,
but social media can. That’s the difference:
you’re in control here. Don’t forget that.
Use it to improve your life, and try to stop
when it detracts from it. If posting stuff
stresses, you out, don’t post for a while. Life
is hard enough! (Of course, for some people,
using social media is a necessity for their
jobs. In that case: change the goal posts.
You have control over the rules of
engagement on social media, so exercise
that.) The thing is, deciding to use social
media healthily is so much easier said than
done. I’m sure we’ve all felt anxious as a
result of social media for one reason or
another, and yet also find
ourselves still worriedly, absent-mindedly
picking up our phones a minute later.
My main advice is this: start using
social media more consciously. It’s rare
enough we take a step back and look at
our habits, why we do what we always
do, and assess if it’s actually working.
Unfollow accounts and block others if you
need to. Make your account private for a
while. Download a mindfulness app that
will tell you how much time you’re using
social media for, and figure out if it’s too
much. If it is, download an app that locks
you out after a while. Delete certain apps.
Turn your phone off during family time –
or at the very least, turn it off vibrate and
place it face-down on the table. Put it onto
do-not-disturb or leave it in another room.
Plug it in at night across the room from
your bed, or buy an alarm clock and don’t
bring it in there at all. Leave your phone at
home sometimes. If it makes you feel
freaked out to leave the house without it,
consider why and do it anyway. Figure out
who you’re worried about judging you
when you post. Think about why you
follow or engage with who you do, and
how it makes you feel. Do what you have
to do – just make sure you’re doing it
consciously.
Knowing something is bad for us
intellectually doesn’t mean it’s a foregone
conclusion that we’ll actually do anything
proactive about it. You’ll have to take a
step back and look at your use of social
media, figure out what makes you feel
uneasy and what makes you feel good,
and act on it.
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