Cosmopolitan August 2018 - Page 99

a long while to realise that the problem wasn ’ t the food , it was my approach towards it . Not eating doesn ’ t make you skinny , it just robs your body of nutrition , making you unhealthy . I struggled with weight issues for a while — I starved myself through the week , binge-ate over the weekend , and then felt immensely guilty ... Let ’ s be honest , we all know fad diets don ’ t work . If you ’ re lucky , you ’ ll only gain the weight you lost . But if you ’ re unlucky , you ’ ll gain double the weight , which will eventually affect you not just physically but also mentally . If you deprive yourself of food and constantly tell your Shaheen Bhatt body that you ’ re on a diet , you force yourself in a state of panic .
After I came to terms with my eating disorder , I started reading and educating myself about choosing a healthy lifestyle . There were times when I would start crying when I ate — it was really sad that my body was so used to associating a meal with being stressed .
But I ’ m very comfortable in my skin now . Through all of this , from being judged for my baby fat to being called a “ skinny b * tch ” on social media , I wore my confidence as my defense . But there ’ s a difference between being comfortable in your skin and truly loving yourself — we really need to love ourselves without the pressure from the society . Women , I feel , are more susceptible to feel that way .
I ’ ve been to therapists , and any good therapist will not just treat your mind , but also your body . And that ’ s where food comes in , because healthy mind and body go hand in hand . I coped with my disorder by educating myself . The biggest lesson that I ’ ve learnt from it is that you must listen to your body . Your body is your own , you need to find what works for you . Consult a nutritionist and make sure that you eat a balanced meal . Do a combination of cardio and weight training , eat on time and drink a lot of water . Trust me , these habits will change your life .
There ’ s also something called ‘ mirror work ’, where you stand in front of a mirror and tell yourself that you love

“ I ’ VE REALISED THAT PAIN EXISTS , AND NOT TALKING ABOUT IS NOT THE SOLUTION .”

yourself . It might sound like faff , but honestly that sh * t works . It ’ s like reprogramming yourself : if you tell yourself that you ’ re amazing , you will feel it .”

SHAHEEN BHATT , Writer

On dealing with depression . “ One of my most vivid memories is from when I was a teenager . I was standing at the door of a mostly empty train compartment , making my way back home from a friends ’ house . I stood silently at the door and stared , fixated on the train tracks as they flew past me in a blur of colour . That ’ s when a little voice piped up in my head , ‘ Jump ’, it said . ‘ Jump , and it will all be over .’ It was my 16th birthday . I was consumed with pain and anguish so ferocious , that in that moment , insane thoughts like ‘ Jump ’ didn ’ t seem insane at all .
I had been living with this familiar but unexplained torment for four years already , but what I didn ’ t know as I stood defeated and helpless on that train was that the torment I was experiencing had a name .
It wasn ’ t until two years later that I was diagnosed with depression , and until then , I had continued to suffer in silence , all the while believing I was a damaged , broken thing that could never be fixed .
As poet CS Lewis put it , ‘ Mental pain is less dramatic than physical pain , but it is more common and also harder to bear . The frequent attempt to conceal mental pain increases the burden . It is easier to say , my tooth is aching , than to say , my heart is broken .’
“ Due to the ( shoulder ) injury and the suffering , I had got into a depression ... but now I am out of it .”
— SHAH RUKH KHAN
“ OCD is weird . I laugh about it now . Everybody has different ways of handling stress . And if I get really stressed thinking about something , I ’ ll start to have the same thought over and over again .” — CAMILA CABELLO
“ I struggled with Body Dysmorphic Disorder ( BDD ) for a long time ... No matter how many times people assured me I look fine or that there ’ s no flaw , I just couldn ’ t accept it .” — ILEANA D ’ CRUZ
“ I just didn ’ t think it could happen to me . But postpartum does not discriminate . I couldn ’ t control it , and that ’ s part of the reason it took me so long to speak up .” — CHRISSY TEIGEN FOR MORE GREAT STORIES
, VISIT COSMO . IN AUGUST 2018 COSMOPOLITAN 99
a long while to realise that the problem wasn’t the food, it was my approach towards it. Not eating doesn’t make you skinny, it just robs your body of nutrition, making you unhealthy. I struggled with weight issues for a while—I starved myself through the week, binge-ate over the weekend, and then felt immensely guilty... Let’s be honest, we all know fad diets don’t work. If you’re lucky, you’ll only gain the weight you lost. But if you’re unlucky, you’ll gain double the weight, which will eventually affect you not just physically but also mentally. If you deprive Shaheen Bhatt yourself of food and constantly tell your body that you’re on a diet, you force yourself in a state of panic. After I came to terms with my eating disorder, I started reading and educating myself about choosing a healthy lifestyle. There were times when I would start crying when I ate—i \X[HY]^HH\\Y˜\X][HYX[]Z[\Y ]x&[H\HYܝXH[^H[ˈY[و\HZ[YY܈^HXH]Z[[YH8'[H8'HۈX[YYXKHܙH^HۙY[B\^HY[K]\x&\HY\[H]Y[Z[˜YܝXH[[\[[[Hݚ[[\[%BX[HYYݙH\[\]]H\\HBHY]KY[HY[ \H[ܙH\\XHY[]^Kx&]HY[\\\[[H\\\[\X][\Z[ ][[\K[]8&\\BY\[X]\HX[HZ[[H[[[ HY]^H\ܙ\HYX][^\[BY\\ۈ]x&]HX\H]\][H]\\[[\K[\H\[\ۋ[HYY[]ܚ܈[Kۜ[H]][ۚ\[XZH\H][HX]H[[YYX[ HX[][ۈو\[[ZYZ[[X]ۈ[YH[[Hو]\\YK\HX][[H[\YK\x&\[Y][[Y8&Z\܈ܚ&K\H[B[[۝وHZ\܈[[[\[][HݙB'YHH [\H[\B[HY\[HY[H\\[ۋ]B[H]و] 'B%RRS'\Z\ H]YX]]˂]\XH\Y\[^\ق[[\ˈ[YH]X[B\Y[[X]Y][x&[\]HH[YHYݙ\[ݙ\YZ['B[\[]ZY[ZHY]ۙ\H] ܚˈ]8&\›ZH\ܘ[[Z[[\[Y[H[[\[][x&\B[X^[[H[Y[] 'BRQSU ܚ]\ۈX[[]\\[ۋ'ۙHو^H[]YY[[ܚY\\H[H\BY[Y\H\[[]B܈وH[H[\HZ[\\Y[ XZ[^H^BXYHHHY[&H\KH[[H]H܈[\Y ^]YۈHZ[X˜\^H]\YH[H\ق\]8&\[H]HXB\Y\[^HXY 8&[\8&K]ZY 8&[\ [][[Hݙ\&B]\^H M\^KH\˜ۜ[YY]Z[[[Z\\[\][][ [[HYZB&[\8&HY&]Y[H[[H][ HYY[][]\[Z[X\][^Z[YܛY[܈\YX\[XYK]]HY&]ۛ\’HYX]Y[[\ۈ]Z[\]BܛY[H\^\Y[[YHK]\۸&][[YX\]\]H\XYۛY]\\[ۋ[[[[HY۝[YYY\[[[K[H[H[Y][H\B[XYY [[][]\H^Y \]]\]] 8&Y[[Z[\\[X]X[\X[Z[]]\[ܙH[[ۈ[[š\\X\H\]Y[][\ۘX[Y[[Z[[ܙX\\H\[]\X\Y\^K^H\˜X[[^K^HX\\[&B'x&UHPSTQURSVTSSSPUTBUSӋ'B'HYY]H\[ܜX‘\ܙ\  H܈Hۙ[YKX]\X[H[Y\[B\\YYHH[H܈]\x&\›]H\[&]X\] 'H8'H\Y&][][\[YK]\[H\\ܚ[Z[]KH[&]۝] []8&\\وHX\ۈ]›YHۙXZ\ 'B%SPSH8&PԕV8%THRQS%SRSHPS‘ԈSԑHԑPUԒQTTUS˒SUQT8" NSUSN