Connections Jan 2015 - Page 37

“Strays, huh,” I said a few seconds later when I knew most of her attention was focused on me again. “You don’t take strays to the vet to get them fixed.” “Hey, it’s in everyone’s best interest to fix roaming animals. Half of those animals starve and so do their offspring. I did them a favor by having them fixed.” “Whatever. They are still not strays,” I said, laughing at her denial. “You know, you should really find yourself a boyfriend instead of another cat,” she threw out in a voice that suggested she had been waiting for an opportunity to bring the subject up again. Damn it. The joys of being close to your siblings. They just love poking sleeping bears. One of these days, this sleeping bear is going snap her hand off if she doesn’t let it lie. “Thanks,” I said sarcastically. “So do you,” I muttered, hoping she didn’t hear my lame-ass retort. “What? You know you do. You’ve been alone a long time. Too long actually,” she said, ignoring said lame-ass retort because she didn’t want to go down that road at all. “I’m well aware of how long I’ve been alone,” I growled. “Trust me. The empty battery packs in the trashcan by my bed tell me exactly how long I’ve been alone.” Ha, I knew alluding to sex would shut her the hell up. “T.M.I,” she shouted, and I heard her remove her earpiece in case I decided to expound a little more on what those batteries operate. I could tell she did this because the overly exaggerated gagging noises she made sounded muffled. I laughed at her. Score one for me. “We’re not having this conversation,” she said, coming back to the line a near full minute later. “Look, I’m just saying you are turning into a recluse. You take classes on-line. You work on-line. Hell, you even shop on-line. And that last one is so not natural. You need to get out. Meet people. Meet men. You need to get laid. Badly.” Another conversation we’ve had too many times. Let the sleeping bear lie already. I’m fine. I like my life. My life is safe, quiet, and