Compassionate Integrity Training CIT-Faciltator-Guide-2.1-Final | Page 76

C OMPASSIONATE I NTEGRITY T RAINING
A S ECULAR E THICS A PPROACH TO C ULTIVATING P ERSONAL , S OCIAL AND E NVIRONMENTAL F LOURISHING
E NDURING H APPINESS VS . T HE H EDONIC T READMILL
Goal: To help participants discover that external factors do not lead to lasting happiness or prevent
difficulties forever. In fact, these external factors lead only to temporary happiness or difficulties and our
pursuit of them can often lead to the opposite of what we want.
Materials: Whiteboard or easel pad, markers
Time: 10 to 15 minutes
Instructions:
1.
Ask participants, “Think about and share some examples of things that bring you happiness.” List
the answers on the whiteboard or easel pad. If any of these examples is an inner quality, such as
patience, gratitude or compassion, place an asterisk next to it.
2.
Next ask, “How long lasting is the happiness that comes from experiencing or achieving these
things?” (If any items are asterisked, you should tell them to exclude those items for now.) While
not minimizing the positive outcomes of these experiences or achievements, try and lead the group
to recognize the impermanent nature of these experiences, and how quickly we tend to move onto
the next goal or challenge when we have achieved them.
3.
Next ask, “Do these things ever bring you unhappiness?” You want the group to recognize the
contingent nature of these external sources of happiness. You also want the group to recognize, if
possible, that striving for the good things and trying to avoid the bad things can lead us to
experience their opposites if we are gripped by a harmful mental state. For example, seeking a
promotion at work is not in and of itself a negative goal to pursue. It is only when one distorts
reality and believes the promotion will bring lasting happiness and an end to all problems that it
can lead to unhappiness and unethical behavior.
4. Ask, “What do we think this list has to do with self-compassion?”
5. Next ask, “How many of these things are external, and at least in some part, beyond our control?”
Without minimizing the positive nature of external forms of happiness you want them to recognize
that they tend to be impermanent, contingent and largely beyond our control. Therefore, they are
very unreliable sources of happiness and can even increase our suffering.
C ENTER FOR C OMPASSION , I NTEGRITY AND S ECULAR E THICS | L IFE U NIVERSITY | M ARIETTA , G EORGIA
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