COMMUNICATION: How To Flirt, Start Conversations And Keep Them Going? In Depth Guide to Approaching, Flirting and Dating | Page 63
level of disclosure and intimacy in a non-threatening manner. Men respond particularly well to this form of humour,
as it closely resembles the 'mock-arguments' and good-humoured exchanges of insults which are their normal means
of expressing friendship among themselves.
The most common mistakes in flirtatious use of humour involve opposite extremes. Men are more likely to over-use
humour or monopolise the joke-telling, and fail to notice that their companion is bored or frustrated. Women
sometimes have a tendency to under-use humour – to adopt a serious tone when their companion would be more
comfortable with light-hearted banter. There are many exceptions, of course: we've all met heavy-going men and
raucous women, but most studies show that women are generally more cautious in their use of humour, while men are
more inclined to avoid heart-to-heart seriousness.
If you feel you may sometimes be guilty of either excessive or inadequate use of humour, watch your companion
carefully for signs of boredom or embarrassment – such as feet or body turning away from you, forced smiles,
reduced eye-contact, reduced verbal attention-signals, fidgeting, defensive arm-crossing, etc. If you are overdoing the
humour, these would be your cues to tone it down a bit. If you are being too serious, lighten up!
Parting
Your approach to leave-taking after a flirtatious
conversation is of critical importance, as it will
determine your future relationship with your
companion.
Many flirtatious encounters are of naturally short
duration – where it is understood that there are no
serious intentions, merely an ego-boosting
acknowledgement of mutual attraction. These lighthearted 'brief encounte