Collin County Living Well Magazine Winter 2015 | Page 22

10 Signs Your Aging Parent
Can’t Live Alone

I

t’s a sad reality that, as we age, we
become less independent than we
once were––but for most blessed
with longevity, it’s inevitable. With
multiple millions of baby boomers
throughout the U.S. caring for elderly
parents, throngs of adult caregivers
struggle with determining if their parent is fit to remain living alone. It’s a
difficult, multi-faceted decision not to
be made lightly, as there is much
at stake––both the physical
and emotional well-being of
the parent in question and for
the extended family at large.

By Carolyn A. Brent, MBA

in a nonchalant way that could
prompt a conversation indicating
assistance is needed here. Keep
a keen eye to discern if the clutter and filth is getting worse with
each visit––it’s often a key sign.

To help ease the process of
determining if an elderly parent should no longer live on
their own, here are 10
tell-tale signs that can
give you better peace
of mind with making this
all-important
decision:
1. Mom or Dad has always
been a great housekeeper,
but the house just doesn’t
look like it used to: You may
remember a parent who was constantly on you about tidying your
room or putting things away after
you were done with them. The
house was always spotless and
everything was organized, clean,
and in its place. There was much
pride in this fact. However, upon
visiting with Mom or Dad today
the home is decidedly cluttered
and not nearly as clean as normal.
Of course, this can mean a lot of
things. Your parent may actually
have an active social life and is
more concerned with staying busy
than tidying up. But, it could be
a more ominous sign that your
parent is having a difficult time
keeping up with all the chores.
She may feel overwhelmed or
his physical health is slowing him
down. Ask your parent if help is
needed with the clutter, but do it

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2. The bills and other mail are
piling up: While we all get
busy––even those who are retired––basic tasks that were often
dealt with quickly and easily when
younger, but that are now falling
by the wayside, is a sign that your
older parent could be getting overwhelmed and not able to manage
their daily affairs. This may also
indicate some signs of forgetfulness and memory issues. Often,
especially if a parent is alone
without a spouse, they may not
have someone to remind them to

COLLIN COUNTY Living Well Magazine | WINTER 2015

go through the mail and check to
see if it’s time to pay certain bills.
3. The checking account balance is wrong and bills are
going unpaid: If the mail, with
bills included, is piling up, there is
a good chance that the bills are not
getting paid. You may also discover amongst mail issues that your
parent’s checking account
ledger balance is wrong or
in arrears. These are also
signs that your parent is
having memory issues
or difficulty with simple math cognition.
It can also indicate
a general apathy–
–a mindset that can
be equally problematic for someone
with the glut of responsibility required
to effectively live alone.
4. Your parent is losing a
lot of weight: A parent who
may have lost their partner or who
is generally depressed often loses
interest in eating due to a reduced
appetite. They may feel that it is
not worth the hassle of shopping
for and preparing meals if they
are now living all alone. Accordingly, pay close attention to your
parent’s weight. Also, check their
refrigerator and pantry to see if
there is an appropriate supply
of food and that what is there is
fresh and edible. If the cupboard
is bare and your parent’s frame
is shrinking, living alone might
become problematic. At the very
least, you may want to think about
bringing groceries by or looking into a service that offers prepared meal delivery. Otherwise,
you may have to think about putting them somewhere that helps
them eat regular, healthy meals.