Collin County Living Well Magazine May/June 2019 | Page 37
WHOSE
JOB IS IT,
ANYWAY?
I
By Rick Allen
am becoming more and more sup-
portive of the concept of cutting
out the middle man. Often this can
make a product or service more af-
fordable. It also seems like we are
getting less and less service from ser-
vice providers these days, so you won-
der just what are we paying for when
a third party is involved?
Here in the Dallas/Ft. Worth area,
there is a television commercial for
an insurance agent who takes great
pride in being a “middle-man”. He
claims that in his case, as a middle
man, he can save you time, money
and get you the best value for your
money spent. I have used this agent
in the past and I will attest that as a
middle man, he does a great job de-
livering what he promises.
Funeral homes, however, have done
a pretty poor job in the recent times
identifying their value to consumers
and a trend has begun that cuts them
out of funeral services because some
of the public view them as unneces-
sary middle men. The Texas Funeral
Service Commission has published a
brochure in which the subject of do-it-
yourself funerals is discussed. While it
is not recommended, it is actually pos-
sible for a family to bury their own,
completely on their own.
Self-sufficiency is not a bad idea,
but where funerals are concerned, a
growing number of people are con-
fusing self-sufficiency with getting
something for nothing. The bad part
about this is, the entity being asked
to provide something for nothing is
not the funeral home, but rather the
place where people go to church.
Several people have told me that
when they die they want to just be
buried or cremated, and then if their
family wants a service, they can
work it out with their church. I have
yet to hear of a church refusing to do
this directly with a family, but when
you get right down to what is right
and what isn’t, is it really the respon-
sibility of the church to act as funeral
directors?
In my opinion, taking this article is ac-
tually a denial of reality. One reason
people claim to have a lack of inter-
est in their own service is the concept
that “I’m not going to be there or know
anything about it anyway.” I, too,
believe this is true, but what about
your spouse, your children, siblings,
friends, or maybe even your parent
or parents? How are they going to
find an appropriate way in which to
accept the fact that a death has oc-
curred, and how will they be able to
say good-bye?
The Frank Capra Film “It’s a Wonder-
ful Life” beautifully illustrates how one
man failed to recognize the manner in
which his life impacted so many others.
Little did the character of George Bai-
ley realize how his actions, no matter
how small or insignificant to him, en-
deared him to so many others in very
powerful ways. It’s far easier to assume
that no one cares or that you yourself
don’t care than to face the fact that you
will be missed and people will want to
honor you when your time here is done.
Putting this responsibility on the door-
step of your church is an easy way
around a tough subject, but a far cry
from the appropriate thing to do. Our
funeral home has been asked on many
occasions to come in and put together
the loose ends. At other times we simply
hear the tales from church volunteers of
how unstructured things seemed when
the funeral home was not involved in
a service. Things get overlooked in the
planning stage and unfortunately are
discovered absent when it’s too late.
Other things that could have made a
huge impact on the service as a whole
are left out completely because no one
knew they could be done. Simply put,
a good funeral director and a thorough
funeral home staff are worth every pen-
ny you may pay to them. They plan
memorial tributes every day, and those
that are really worth something are
constantly searching for ways to inno-
vate and contemporize the way people
say good-bye.
Does value exist at all funeral homes?
No. That is why I encourage you to
discuss your plans with more than one
funeral home. See the difference for
yourself and then make a decision on
which one you think will do the best
job at helping you and your family
create something that is meaningful,
appropriate and affordable.
Rick Allen has been the owner of Allen Family Funeral Options for over 35 years and may be reached at 972-596-8200,
or you may visit their website at www.AFFOplano.com.
COLLIN COUNTY Living Well Magazine | MAY/JUNE 2019
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