Coffee Shop Goss Pottsville > Fingal - July 2014 | Page 13

FOCUS ON THE FAMILY Connecting With Your Child To connect with our children, we must understand their emotions and experience those emotions with them. Let’s see how one mother, Sheri, spent her morning connecting with her 5-yearold son, Nicholas. 7 a.m. — Nicholas wakes up screaming. Sheri runs to Nicholas and holds him tight. “You sound scared. What’s wrong?” she asks. But Nicholas doesn’t respond; he just cries. Sheri continues to hold him until he calms down, saying, “Whatever it is, you’re really sad. I’m here for you.” Soon, Nicholas stops crying and asks for breakfast. What Sheri did right: Sheri acknowledged Nicholas’s feelings. Instead of telling Nicholas to stop crying, Sheri labelled Nicholas’s feeling and allowed him the chance to express that feeling. Nicholas sensed that it was okay to be sad and scared. Nicholas will likely feel free to express these feelings in the future. Sheri tells Jacob the same and takes Nicholas aside. She tells him, “Nicholas, I know you’re mad. It upsets you when Jacob pushes you. You need to tell him not to push because pushing hurts.” What Sheri did right: Sheri focused on Nicholas’s negative behaviour while م