Bossy! Magazine Issue 1 November 2014 | Page 26

Make Your Hot Mess, Your Hot Message! by Andrea C. Imafidon

"Lessons often come dressed up as detours and roadblocks." -Oprah

At 31 years young, I am learning that there is a time and place in which we should take off our mask and show another side to us. At times, you become tired of holding it together and want to fall apart only to pick up the pieces. Currently, I am in a vulnerable place in which I want to share a piece of my story to depict my journey from turning my mess into a message, my trial into a triumph and going from being a victim into a victor.

In 2010, I found myself residing in Chicago, in the valley, on the verge of a divorce and at a pinnacle of my life. I was a HOT MESS! Day in and day out, I was having an out of body experience and living life on autopilot because it felt like my life was crashing down all around me. Yes, I lived in a nice neighborhood, in a decent, new renovated but expensive apartment within the Hyde Park neighborhood only a few blocks away from The Obamas residence and Jessie Jackson's PUSH Coalition, Headquarters but I was feeling less than Presidential? Because I was feeling broken, hopeless and angry. I asked myself 'Why' so many days and nights. I had plenty of ugly crying sessions, praying sessions and pity parties.

One day while sitting in my Downtown Chicago cubicle, one of my coworker who I appreciate dearly and helped me to discovered my strength through the muck and mess that I was in. She looked at me while I was on the verge of a breakdown and kindly but firmly said to me, 'Andrea, you are such an amazing and talented woman, you are wasting your time and talents in Chicago.' Go home to your family because you need them. At first, I was highly upset because she called me out on my ish! Honestly, I thought I had myself together because I was thriving at work but dying on the inside because I was going through it! I had to accept and take ownership that I was a temporary hot mess. How did she realize that I was a hot mess? I thought I had my stuff together but I was entirely wrong!