BOOM July - Page 45

ally ends, the buttons don't pull (hint: if they do, your shirt is too tight), and the sleeves fall about halfway down the back of your hand when the cuff is unbuttoned, everything else can be nipped and tucked to perfection by a professional. People suspect you may be wearing an adult diaper under your chinos You heard the slim fit message loud and clear with denim, but why do your other slacks sag and slouch like you dropped a deuce back there? Frankly, there's no good reason for committing such a heinous crime. The basic rule of thumb: all pants in your possession should fit more or less like your favourite pair of jeans. Frankenstein wouldn't mind wearing your work shoes Chunky lug-soled shoes or something with a stubby square toe isn't appropriate for an office or anywhere else. Yeah, yeah -- we know you think their comfort can't be beat. Unfortunately, that same comfort has come at the price of dumbing down the rest of your duds. Fancy footwear is certainly an investment, but that's exactly where fashion and fit find common ground to yield their biggest returns. Your briefcase is black nylon and came free with the purchase of a laptop Nylon is for camping and kids under the age of 12. Leather, on the other hand, is king when it comes to a man's bag. And while there's a premium to pay, natural leathers won't wear and tear (or fray) like that synthetic stuff. With proper care, a leather bag will only get better with age. Your watch could double as a helipad These days, the trend is toward the horologic extremes. On one end is old school simplicity like Mad Men-era heirlooms, military watches, and sportier diving styles. On the other is a new generation of timepieces for Apple-obsessed tech types. While guys will undoubtedly fall into two camps here, one thing is undeniable: carting around one of those mammoth mid-2000s designs should tell you it's time for a trade-in. The only socks you have are white (and very possibly tube-shaped), and you're not really sure when you last bought underwear The socks probably also came packed in a plastic bag. We're not saying you shouldn't have athletic socks; we would just prefer that they stay out of the spotlight. Your best bet is a no-show sock that, as the name suggests, is not visible to the outside world. One. Little. Bit. It's surprising how a sock (or lack thereof) can shave years off your life while simultaneously upping the ante on your coolness. As for your undies, stop stuffing those bulky boxer shorts into your pants. Grow up and guard your precious jewels properly with briefs that fall somewhere toward the center of the spectrum between bikini and tighty-whitey. If that's too much leg for your liking, boxer-briefs are also an acceptable answer. Sometimes the circles under your eyes are darker MEN’S than Adam Lambert, Pete Wentz, and Billie Joe Armstrong combined There's a cream for that. You may think all those skincare lotions and potions are a bunch of bull. And while there's bound to be a batch of snake oil sitting somewhere on the cosmetics counter, under eye serums containing retinol have science to support their claims. After a few weeks of regular use, you'll start to see and feel the difference. Got a heavy workload ahead? Get used to it. It's only the guys amping up their image constantly who find themselves living life at the next level. 45 | BOOM