BALA Stories:
Going Back Home or Not
This story represents the possible issues that one could encounter when marrying a person from the continent. This story has been altered a bit in order to provide anonymity for this sister, but consider these situations and others when deciding to move to the continent.
She is married to an amazing African man. She was tired of Abu Dhabi, it was stressful, so she decided that they would move to his home country and live a carefree life with the locals. Abu Dhabi had become just as stressful as the west, somewhere that she wanted to anxiously exit.
Her husband, well, he wasn’t too keen. For some reason he abhorred the idea of returning. Maybe Abu Dhabi was his escape. It was once hers too, but it wasn’t anymore. Anyway, he wasn’t having it.
They devised a plan that would please them both. They would visit his country and determine the date of their move. She was relaxed. This was the perfect place for them to take a vacation. Until IT started to happen. The asking became relentless. Everyone’s hand was out because her husband was now married to the wealthy American. The fact that they had four children and two that lived in America being supported by them didn’t matter. They needed gifts, bills paid, and anything else that they couldn’t afford. Some family members even wanted designer labels, when she never bought them for herself. It was overwhelming.
When they announced their chosen city, his family members began to plan their move too. The husband was affected by the pressure to care for not only his immediate family, but a large extended family. He couldn’t imagine living there. She was unaffected by their incessant begging, she easily said no, but she didn’t have the ramifications that he had for saying no. However, she could feel her husband’s stress. She enjoyed her stay in that country, but she realized the pressures to be financially responsible for an extended family would affect their goal of relaxation. They both decided that his home was the ideal vacation spot, but not a final destination for them.
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