Badassery Magazine November 2017 Issue 18 - Page 18

detected it as early as possible. This is good because her type of cancer is treatable by chemo and radiation. This is good because we live in a first world society with world class medicine. This is good because we all real- ize now that none of us gets out alive and we need to love each other now and fiercely. Sometimes you won’t be able to bring yourself to say that this is good in any way Maybe it hurts too much. Then you can start with this sucks less because… At least… Please know that finding some- thing of value and merit doesn’t ever exempt another person from wrongdoing or mean that your feelings are utterly and com- pletely valid. This is not about ever letting someone else off the hook, it’s about letting yourself off the hook. I’m not suggesting you ignore your feelings. Or try to talk yourself out of grief. But when an experience has hijacked your brain and your heart, you have a technique to take it back. This is good because may NOT work for you. It may make you angry and sick to your stomach. If it does, then shift the word- ing into something that doesn’t trigger anger or panic. Maybe “despite the pain and frustra- tion, the lesson or gift here is…” This HAS good because. This situation HAS good because. This situation that feels so aw- ful right now has unintended consequences of good because… Because I am amazing, I have found slivers of goodness in this horrible awful no good situation because it has led me to XYZ. Or.. “well shit. This is good be- cause it makes a great story.” I’m not trying to Pollyanna here. Many people need a solid throat punch and sometimes life really does suck, but let Karma han- dle that. Feel your anger. Throw plates at the wall if that’s your thing. But then get back on track as fast as possible. Practice this framing on the little things for a week and let me know if you start to feel a sense of relief of being freed from an- ger. You deserve freedom. Your homework? Reframe one situation and email me with the subject line THIS IS GOOD BECAUSE and I’ll give you per- sonal feedback and a hell yeah to keep you going on your progress. I’d love to hear from you. allie@ creativegangsters.com You’ve got this, you beautiful badass.  About the Author Yo, I'm Allie Smith. Solopreneur Coach + Tribe Builder + Visual Content Creator. I have a B.A. in Literature and Writing Studies and an M.S. in Instructional and Per- formance Technology (basically adult learning with an emphasis in online learning, sounds super smarty pants, right?). I have worked with scientists, doctors and PhDs via strategy calls and ongoing professional training in mastermind groups to further their career and personal development. And now I use all those skills to help solopre- neurs build their online marketing. I’m wildly multi-passionate and my passions are mindful travel, craft coffee and photography. One of my joys is working with clients to use their message to attract and build a fierce, loyal following. I also have an Instagram addiction.  I read all my own email and I’d love to connect. allie@creativegangsters.com 17