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urvivors, this is a call to arms.
This is a call to action. This
is a call for redemption. Not
against anyone that’s wronged
you. But against the shit you live
with day in and day out because
your ego is telling you ‘This is as
good as it gets”. This is a call to
improve yourself to improve your
circumstances.
If there is one thing that irks the
ever living piss out of my soul, it’s
watching ‘survivors’ fall back into
old patterns and mindsets because
they haven’t made a concrete, not-
budging-for-nothin’ decision! Lis-
ten, I get it. I know what it means
to decide and make a commitment
to yourself about literally changing
who you are as a person; how you
operate and exist in your day-to-
day. But you CANNOT sit there
and say that you’re surviving and
that you’re happy with just that if
you’re falling back into old bullshit.
Let me explain. If you were totally
happy and content in that survival
mode of life, then the things that
trigger you and pull you back into
those old, dusty places wouldn’t
have such a hold on you. If you
were truly satisfied with ‘your lot’
then that old bullshit would have
zero power over you. But it does.
And it’s going to continue to rule
you unless you really step up and
remind YOU of who you really are!
I say this with love and my own
special mixture of bluntness and
compassion: The fears and old
bullshit that you ALLOW to control
your life makes you the worst kind
of victim. It’s not enough to know
that you’re not further down that
line of survivor-hood. I need you
to understand that the allowance,
the complacency that you have for
all this old shit to crop up and rule
you means that you’re victimizing
yourself. That’s just something I
will not sit back and watch silently.
You’re far stronger than you think...
and you think too much!
I wish I could give you even an ap-
proximation of just how many peo-
ple have confided in me that they
wish that these fears didn’t ruin
their lives; that those fears didn’t
keep them stuck. I’ve talked to my
motley crew of Umbrella-ers and
things like failure, visibility, disap-
pointing someone, success, and
fear of pain, survival, being seen
as a fraud, and more are the things
that they wish they didn’t have
to deal with. Which really, if you
think about it, if they didn’t have to
deal with them, why would they?
All this shit boils down to 1 thing:
WORTHINESS.
At the end of the day and any
which way this particular subject
is deduced, worthiness of being
good enough, worthiness of love,
worthiness of gods-only-know-
what is the seed of our fears. Oh!
And how fucken easy is it to blame
society, a spouse, our parents? It’s
so easy to point fingers and assign
blame without taking responsibili-
ty for our own damn actions! Or,
rather, inactions.
The moment you DECIDE to stop
assigning blame to others for
YOUR inaction is the moment that
you sever that victim bridge. The
link between victim and survivor
no longer exists; therefore, you
can no longer go back that way
and start with the finger point-
ing. The second that you take full
on responsibility for your shit, for
your actions, for your pain, you will
have this clarity like nothing you’ve
known before. You’ll see that you
are far, far, far stronger than you
ever imagined and that, at the
end of the day, up until this point,
you’ve been victimizing yourself.
I need you not only to believe this,
but to live this. To practice this.
The moment you no longer have
victimhood to fall back on is the
moment that you take your pow-
er back from all that bullshit that
used to pull you back down! It is
in that instant that we start actual-
ly healing. As cliche and annoying
as this shit can be: time does heal
all wounds. But what happens be-
tween an incident, your feelings,
and the moment you decide to not
be dragged down by that shit? You
process, you learn, and you take
responsibility! You grow up a little
bit more. Fuck! You actually die a
sort of death; and in some cases,
that victim has already died be-
cause, SCIENCE!
Surviving isn’t Enough
Dude you can go through every
single day of your life just doing the
shit that is expected of you: work,
eat, sleep, kids, spouse, sleep,
work, eat...you get it. OR you can
go through every single day taking
conscious, active steps towards
becoming the absolute best fucken
version of YOU that you can be. I
can’t make you get there. Sam and
Kathy can’t make you get there.
Gary f-n V. can’t make you get
there. YOU HAVE TO GET YOU
THERE! Plain and simple.
Surviving this life and going
through the motions just be-
cause you think that’s the best
you can do is victim-speak.
Victims don’t think that they de-
serve better. Victims don’t think
they are worthy. Survivors
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