So , third , I limit the amount of time I will wallow . I allow myself wallowing time – without it , I have found I cannot really come back up to the positive . I , myself personally , acutely need to acknowledge and affirm the negative emotions so that I can then …
Fourth , redirect . I find something else to do . Ideally , something that I feel strong and powerful and competent on . To remind myself : this . This is what I am good at , and this is leading me somewhere , even if I don ’ t know where exactly yet . I enter into the reality that this task is productive toward a positive end of building my castle . Because I ’ m a fucking princess , dammit . I ’ m going to live in a castle that I build my damn self . I ’ m not going to lie to you : there are times it ’ s more difficult to find something that feeds back into those positive feelings of self-efficacy . Sometimes it ’ s a desperate pursuit , clinging to anything that will get my mind off the wallowing . And the more I redirect , the easier it becomes to use that productively . A little as an escape , but it really has become a means to reconnecting with my stronger side .
Fifth , I check back in from time to time to see if those negative feelings need attention . Sometimes they dissolve quickly and quietly . Sometimes they need further attention – but again , I limit the amount of time I spend on them . I vent , I cry , I scream if necessary . And then I find something else to do . Because I ’ m an INFP – I live inside my head endlessly , creating worlds and scenarios that mostly never happen . But it is my way of processing through a world rife with stimuli to make sense of my place .
This week was a particularly tough one – on both personal and professional levels . I have a lot of prospects initiated and am either waiting to hear back or have heard “ I went a different way ” or “ I ’ m slammed right now ; check back with me on { date }”. And so I got together with two other very badass independent women business owners to discuss new ideas for collaborative projects . I need to have other things so I don ’ t allow myself to get sucked into the vortex of negativity and despair . And I put things on my calendar to pursue projects that make me feel powerful . And intelligent . And constructive .
And I breathe a little easier , even when something else hits . If I ’ ve adequately done the above , the hits don ’ t knock me about as much .
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I ’ ve lived in Raleigh for over 24 years , though I grew up outside Chicago and am a die-hard Bears fan . My experience extends from the legal field to branding to business development . A self-proclaimed and unabashed over-achiever , I ’ m full-time single mom of three while pursuing my dreams and career passions . An independent business owner , I help other entrepreneurs refine their message , clarify their direction , and then confidently pursue their visions .
Sadie Harper
One childhood dream was to be a writer , leading to winning first prize in Carolina Woman Magazine ’ s 2016 writing contest with a poem , though I do not consider myself a poet ! A story-teller , I love to find the right voice , the right narrative , and the right words to bring them all to life .
southernambitionnc . blogspot . com
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