PARENTAL ADVICE
drove out to tour the facility to see what I thought. It
was love at first sight. It was small, enclosed, beautiful,
and the workers and children seemed to be having
the times of their lives: again, much needed affirma-
tion that this was the right thing to do.
It took a while to fill out the applications, find financial
assistance, and get the courage to sign my daughter
up. When the time came, I wasn’t sure that I could fol-
low through. I sobbed the entire drive there and back,
not to mention crying on Michelle’s shoulder when I
got there, and another’s friend’s shoulder on the way
home (thanks again, Jen).
I wondered if such a place even existed. It needed to
have nursing care, one-on-one direct care, and a deep
understanding of what it is like to work with a child
who is severely cognitively impaired, nonverbal, phys-
ically impaired, with a seizure disorder, Down syn-
drome, and autism spectrum disorder (ASD). That’s a
lot to put on someone you don’t know, and it’s very
scary. Like, cry-yourself-to-sleep terrifying, which I did
multiple times.
My friend, Michelle, immediately found a place called
Saint Francis Camp on the Lake. It was only an hour and
a half from our home, was very affordable, and even
offered scholarships. Most importantly, it seemed to
offer all of the things I was looking for. I started to re-
search this place with great trepidation. This was my
child’s life and safety I was dealing with. That’s not
something that any mother would take lightly.
I called and talked to the director of the camp, another
Michelle (that must be a magical name), and she was
amazingly helpful and reassuring. That made me feel
like this might the right choice for our family. I then
The first time I dropped her off was a little rough.
Not really on Lexi, but on me. I cried every day and
emailed the camp director about four times a day to
check in. Thank goodness she had the patience of a
saint. The second time was easier and the third time
was excellent. Now we drop Lexi off, and she barely
hugs us goodbye before latching onto her counsel-
or and heading to her dorm. Enter more tears from
Mama. They dried pretty quickly that time, however,
and were, for the most part, tears of joy.
I know that sending your child away to be taken care
of by someone else is one of the scariest things a par-
ent will ever experience. I’m talking can’t-catch-your-
breath, paralyzing, nightmare-giving, crying-to-your-
mom-on-the-phone, panic-attack-causing fear. We’ve
all been there, but when your child is on the autism
spectrum and is nonverbal, those fears are magnified
by about a billion.
I will tell you this, though; I have zero regrets about the
choice I made that day. I am a much more sane and
balanced person now that I have permitted myself to
take a break. I’m a better wife, mother, sister, daughter,
employee, and friend because I take time for me once
in awhile. I can give more of myself to charities and
other families who are dealing with these situations,
which is the cry of my heart.
My friend, Michelle, immediately found a place called Saint
Francis Camp on the Lake. It was only an hour and a half from our
home, was very affordable, and even offered scholarships. Most
importantly, it seemed to offer all of the things I was looking for.
44 | Autism Parenting Magazine | Issue 71